Post by Eli Buchanan on Jan 7, 2018 23:27:35 GMT -5
The live crowd is hot in the Target Centre in Minneapolis, Minnesota as we go to our announcing team, Greg Stradford and “Big Bad” Paul Carlyle and are welcomed to PWGP’s first special event “Battle Bowl”, where we will crown the company’s first ever Global Champion. The announcers remind us that tonight we will see a series of “Lethal Lottery” matches, where individuals will randomly placed together in tag team matches with only the winning teams moving forward into the Battle Bowl battle royal to determine the Global Champion.
With the card being so loaded, we go straight to our opening match.
MATCH 1
Television Title Match
Faititili (c) (6 points)
vs
Eli Buchanan (1 point)
As the bell rings and the two competitors shake hands, the announcers remind us that Eli Buchanan is not allowed to participate in the Lethal Lottery tonight because of his two losses to Kraken in recent weeks. Stradford suggest if Buchanan was to win the Television Title tonight it would be sort of a consolation prize, while Carlyle opening mocks Eli, calling him a choke artist.
In the opening moments of the match the offence goes back and forth, with both men getting in some of their trademark moves. A super kick by Faititili knocks Eli out of the ring, leading to a running dive by the Samoan warrior. Faititli would roll Eli back into the ring and went to the top rope, looking for the flying splash. Eli would manage to get to his feet and crotch him. He would climb to the middle rope and deliver an avalanche style belly-to-belly suplex, sending Faititli crashing in the middle of the ring. Buchanan would go for the pin but only get a two count. He would follow up with a series of German suplexes and go for another pin attempt after the fourth, but again only get a two count. Frustrated, Eli would go for the Chaos Driver, but Faititili would escape out the back and catch Eli with a headbutt followed by a super kick, which knocked Eli to the mat. Faititili would quickly ascend to the top rope and flew off looking for the splash, but Buchanan got his knees up and the Samoan warrior had the wind knocked out of him.
The crowd cheered and firmly got behind Eli as he climbed to his feet and wasted no time hitting the Boyame and going for the pinfall. It was at this moment Agents of Pain ran down to ringside and distracted referee, Andrew Roller. With Roller’s attention elsewhere, “Iron” Mack Brody would enter the ring and nearly take Eli Buchanan’s head off with a huge clothesline. With the crowd booing, Brody would drag Faititili on top of Buchanan and quickly make his exit. The Agents of Pain would back away from the ring, allowing Andrew Roller to turn around and make the three count.
Winner: and still Television Champion, Faititili (8 points)
Faititili looks confused as Roller hands him the Television Title. He looks at Eli, as he slowly gets to his feet. He sees Brody and the Agents of Pain standing on stage and realizes what’s happened. He apologizes to Eli and the camera picks up him offering Buchanan another shot at his title anytime. The two shake hands as we go to the back.
***
We go to the go to the locker room of Asper’s Army where Asper, Kraken and True North Ant are frilled with what has just occurred. Brody and the Agents arrive and the group celebrate together. Asper brags that they have all but destroyed Buchanan’s career at this point and tells the group with this last embarrassment they’re finally done with the Last Dragon.
It’s time for them to move forward, Asper states, telling the group to stick to their plan. Tonight will be their crowning achievement as they all make sure that Kraken walks out this evening as Global Champion. The group agrees and high five one another.
***
Elsewhere we find Eli and Faititili walking together. Faititilil once again tells Eli he can have another shot at the Television Title anytime he likes. BUAC Spokesman, Robert Fredrick enters and says Faititili might change his mind after he hears what he has to offer. Fredrick tells Eli it was unfortunante what happened to him tonight and promise him Asper’s Army will not be allowed to get away with this. He wishes Eli a good night and hopes he enjoys the rest of the show, before leaving with Faititili to discuss his proposal.
A dejected Eli is left shaking his head sadly. As he starts towards his locker room he passes a few stage hands who are discussing how an extra match was being added to the Lethal Lottery, taking the total number of participants up to twenty four. The stage hands suddenly realise Eli is standing there and quickly depart, leaving Eli looking completely dejected.
***
Down at ringside we find the announcers blown away by this news. Carlyle laughs, pointing out that now there are four more men who have an opportunity to become Global Champion and Eli Buchanan isn’t one of them.
He and Stradford turn their attention to Saul Asper making his way down to the ring with Kraken in tow. Stradford reminds us that due to Kraken’s victory on the debut episode of “Charge” four weeks ago, he is allowed to pick his own partner in the Lethal Lottery and the announcers wait with fainted breath to find out who his pick will be.
Asper grabs a mic and brags about how everything that has occurred over the last few weeks has went exactly how he planned and tonight the plan comes to its conclusion as Kraken becomes the first ever PWGP Global Champion. He announces that the gentleman who will help ensure everything continues to go as plan is his pick to be Kraken’s tag team partner, none other than “Iron” Mack Brody!
The announcer point out how great a move this is as Brody makes his way down to the ring. Not only is Brody a member of Asper’s Army, but these two have experience as a tag team and held tag team gold together in Japan. The two big men embrace once Brody gets in the ring and we wait to find out who their opponents will be.
Robert Fredrick appears on the “Charge Tron”, alongside his assistant, Deedee Gagnon. He congratulates Asper and Kraken on the wise choice and asks Deedee to draw the two names of their opponents. The first name drawn is Moondog Runt. The second is Thing Dos.
MATCH 2
Lethal Lottery Match 1
Kraken and “Iron” Mack Brody (w/ Saul Asper)
vs
Moondog Runt (w/ The Guru) and Thing Dos
Both men make their way down to the ring as the announcer point out how things continue to seem to go the way of Asper’s Army. Not only are neither of these men in the same league as Kraken or Brody, but they can’t stand one another, having feuded long before PWGP started on the air.
Right off the bell Kraken and Brody attack, tossing Runt out of the ring and concentrating their attention on Thing Dos. The two big men make a series of quick tags while beating Dos in their own corner with a body attacks and power moves. Moondog Runt manages to get back up in his corner, but seeing both his opponents eyeing him up, drops back down and leaves ringside as Kraken finishes Dos off with a devastating leg trap chokeslam and makes the cover for the easy three count.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, Kraken and “Iron” Mack Brody
The announcers point out that Kraken and Brody are walking away from this match in excellent shape, not fatigued in the least. Is anyone going to be able to stop them from completeing their plan here tonight?
***
Back to Robert Fredrick’s office and Deedee picks the next four participants. The first name picked, The Technician, and his partner for the match, Alan Hunter. Their opponents for the match, OH MY GOD, it’s Brutus Smith, and his tag team partner, the prodical son of Jimmy Jive, James Daniels.
MATCH 3
Lethal Lottery Match 2
The Technician (w/ The Guru) and Alan Hunter
vs
Brutus Smith and James Daniels
Daniels obviously feels like he’s one the lottery, pun inteneded, teaming up with the masked giant, Brute. He arogantly announces that he’s the team’s captain and tells the big man to get on the apron while he takes care of business. Smith just shakes his head and gets out of the ring while Daniels squares up with The Technician.
The announcers remind us that The Technician claims to be the greatest technical wrestler in the world and he seems intent on proving the point, quickly taking Daniels down with a hip toss, transitioned into a hammerlock. Daniels quickly makes it to the ropes, forcing the break and tags in Brute. As the giant enters, Tech tries to pick the leg, but Brute blocks it and chops him across the back. Screaming in pain, The Technician tags in Alan Hunter and rolls out of the ring.
Alan enters the ring and sizes up the giant. He decides to charge in, ducking a clothesline attempt from Smith and tries to chop away at the big man’s leg with a series of kicks. Brute manages to grab a hold of him and pushes him into the corner and starts lighting up his chest with a open hand slap to the chest, followed by a second. Daniels tags himself in and orders a confused Brutus Smith out of the ring, as he starts lying the boots into Hunter in the corner. He whips Hunter across the ring and rushes in looking for a clothesline. Hunter gets his foot up, catching Daniels in the face and then catches him a spin heel kick.
Both men are down and slowly make their ways to their seperate corner. Daniels reaches his first and slaps Brute on the chest, ordering him in the ring. Smith gets in the ring and looks intently at Daniels, who continues to yell at him to finish their opponents off for them. In response Smith grabs Daniels by the throat and chokeslams him in the centre of the ring. The big man exits the ring as The Technician steps in. He grabs Daniels in a front chancery and delivers a fisherman suplex, craddling him for the pinfall victory.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, The Technician and Alan Hunter
***
In Robert Fredrick’s office the next four Lethal Lottery particapants are drawn. It will be the seamonster, Vod, and Moondog Buster. Their opponents, Mexican cencation, Cielo Guerrera and Sweet Daddy D.
MATCH 4
Lethal Lottery Match 3
Vod and Moondog Buster (w/ The Guru)
vs
Cielo Guerrera and Sweet Daddy D
The Guru tries to keep the peace between Buster and Vod, reminding his client they need to work with Vod to advance to Battle Bowl. The two men seem recluctant to do so but agree.
The match starts off with Vod and Guerrera, and the luchadore quckly takes adavantage of his opponent’s lack of experince to hit a series of arm drags and a headscissors takeover. Guerrera tags in Sweet Daddy D and they whip Vod into the ropes, hitting a double hip toss on the seamonster.
Vod rolls to his corner and tags in Buster, who makes the mistake of rushing in and getting hip tossed by Sweet Daddy D. “The Sweetner” would body slam the larger man and tags Cielo back into the ring. Cielo hits an assisted backflip press and goes for the cover, only getting one. He picks Buster up and goes for another Irish whip, but Buster reverses and Vod pulls down the top rope, causing the luchadore to tumble to the arena floor.
Referee Jose Doe admonishing the monster for his actions but quickly finds himself trying to hold Buster back from going to attack Guerrera. Meanwhile, Vod drops down, and scooping the luchadore up, slams him on the floor. Sweet Daddy D tries to go stop this from happening, but Doe, not seening what has transpired, goes to stop him. This allows Vod and Buster to work over Guerrera outside the ring, driving him back first into the ring apron. Jose Doe finally catches on to what they’re doing and orders Vod back to his corner.
Buster rolls Guerrera back into the ring and tags in Vod. Vod scoops Buster up and slams him on the luchadore. The Moondog seems bothered by this but rolls out of the ring at the encouragement of his manager, as Vod goes for the cover and gets a two count. The seamonster hits a pendulum back breaker and presses down, looking for a submission victory. He tags Buster back into the ring and the Moondog hits an elbow drop while Vod hold Guerrera over his knee and goes for the pin. Sweet Daddy D rushes in the ring, however, and breaks up the count.
Vod is tagged back into the ring by Buster and the two of them whip Guerrea across the ring. They go for a double hip toss but Guerrera’s feet land on the top rope and he flips backwards on to his feet and superhumanly hits a arm drag on both men. With the crowd cheering him on he starts crawling towards Sweet Daddy D. Vod grabs his foot, but Guerrera counters with an enzuguri kick. Buster tries to hit a elbow drop, but Guerrera rolls out of the way and makes the tag.
Sweet Daddy D comes in like a house on fire, clotheslining both men. He catches Vod with an atomic drop sending him bumping into Buster, who falls out of the ring. Sweet Daddy D picks the leg on Vod and quickly locks in the Figure Four. Buster manages to get back in the ring to break up the submission attempt, but Cielo Guerrera is quick to drop kicks Buster into the corner. Guerrera and Sweet Daddy D hit a double super kick to Vod, who rolls out of the ring. “The Sky Warrior” doesn’t give him a chance to catches his breath, as he quickly hits a top rope plancha to take him out. Back in the ring Sweet Daddy D hits a body slam and climbs to the top rope and hits a flying elbow drop. He tags Cielo back in and drags Buster to their corner. Guerrera hits a breath-taking 630 Splash to secure the victory for the pair, as Sweet Daddy D stands guard.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, Cielo Guerrera and Sweet Daddy D
The two men celebrate in the ring as we watch Vod get up, holding his head. He slides into the ring after their opponents make their exit. Moondog Buster tries to get to his feet and Vod takes the opportunity to scoop him up and hits the Deep Six before exiting the ring and making his way to the back.
***
Back to Robert Fredrick’s office and another four men are about to be picked for the Lethal Lottery. It will be Bryant Adam Thompson and “High Five” Jimmy Jive vs The Agents of Pain.
The announcers can’t believe the lock of the draw for the Agents of Pain to have been picked together. They are speculating over what the odds of this must be when James Daniels suddenly comes out and attacks his father, Jimmy Jive, on his way to the ring with a chair. He hits several chair shots before Thompson has the chance to come to his partner’s aid.
Inside the ring, The Agents of Pain are more than pleased by what appears to have become a glorified handicap match, but Robert Fredrick appears on the Charge Tron and announces that the BUAC had a contigency plan in case something like this was to happen. He states that a list of alternatives was made in case of injury and he tells Thompson to meet his new partner, offering his apology as he does.
Goober the Gooker struts out and makes his way to the ring. Bryant Adam Thompson can’t believe his bad luck but doesn’t have a chance to do anything before The Agents of Pain attack him from behind and referee, Andrew Roller has no choice but call for the bell.
MATCH 5
Lethal Lottery Match 4
Bryant Adam Thompson and Goober the Gooker
vs
The Agents of Pain (Agent B and Agent D, w/ Saul Asper)
The Agents continue their double team assault on Thompson while Goober continues to strut slowly down to the ring. With Agent B calling the shots, he and Agent D work over Bryant, hitting a double team slingshot suplex and D goes for the cover. The Notorious B.A.T. kicks out but the Agents treat this as a personal insult and start stomping away. Andrew Roller tries to keep the Agents in line but they ignore his instructions as they continue to their assault. It’s only when he threatens to disqualify them that they take the threat serious and Agent B leaves the ring.
Goober finally gets up on the apron as Agent D hits a huge shoulder breaker on Bryant. He tags in B, who sets up for the Implant DDT, but Bryant manages to spin free and hit a surpries Pele kick to rock the agent. He tries to go for the tag, but B grabs him by the ankle and tags in D, who rushes in and stomps on Bryant’s back. The Agents hit another double suplex and decide to finish it. They whip Bryant into the ropes and go for the Flap Jack, but Bryant counters into a double DDT.
With the crowd cheering, Bryant crawls to this corner and makes the tag and Goober gets the biggest pop reaction from the crowd in his entire career. He charges in and hits a double clothesline. The turkey man slams Agent D, then slams B on top of him. He tosses B out of the ring and signals he’s going for the Crossface Turkey Wing. Asper chooses this time to jump up on the apron to distract Goober, which allows both Agents the opportunity to recover. D blindsides Goober with a running forearm and knocks Bryant off the apron. Agent B slides back into the ring and the pair hit the Flap Jack on Goober and get the three count.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, The Agents of Pain
After the match, Bryant rolls into the ring. The Agents quickly make their exit and head to the back with Asper. The announcers put over the fact that with this win, four of the five members of Asper’s Army are know in Battle Bowl. Carlyle says if there was a chance Kraken wouldn’t be walking out of tonight as Global Champion, it was all but gone now, and Stradford states this is a fact he finds hard to dispute now.
***
Robert Fredrick is wondering out loud how in the world Asper’s Army was able to be that lucky, with the Agents being drawn together as a team. His assistant, Deedee, shrugs her shoulders and offers to drawn the names for the next match. It will be Thing Uno and La Mosca Loca, another represenative of PWGP’s Mexican affliliate, AMLL, versus Zaros and Vlars. The two of them look confused as one another as neither of them know who Vlars is.
Down at ringside we soon find out, as the first three men all make their way down to ringside. Vlars is revealed to be the mysterious janitor carrying around the mop and bucket. Greg Stradford reveals that all we know about him is he claims to be “the puke bucket god”, but neither he or Paul Carlyle understand what that means.
MATCH 6
Lethal Lottery Match 5
La Mosca Loca and Thing Uno
vs
Zaros and Vlars
Zaros and Thing Uno start off the match going right after one another, with Uno getting the advantage. He tags in Mosca, who shows off some of the very same lucha skills we saw earlier in the show with Cielo Guerrera. Following a series of arm drags, “The Crazy Fly” tags Uno back into the ring and they hit a pair of somersault sentons and Uno goes for the cover. Zaros manages to kick out at two, then jabs a thumb in Uno’s eye, allowing him to tag in his partner.
The crowd isn’t sure what to make of the bald headed man as he first enters into the ring, but he quickly shows what he’s made of as he nearly takes Thing Uno’s head off with a clothesline. The so-called “puke bucket god” knocks Mosca off the apron with a cheap shot and while referee Jose Doe tries to keep the angered luchadore out of the ring, Vlars calls Zaros into and the goblin stomps away on Uno’s chest while Vlars stands on his throat.
Jose Doe finally sees what’s happened and orders one of them out of the ring and Vlars departs. Stradford points out there was no tag there, which Carlyle argues and states he’s starting to like this nutty janitor. Meanwhile Zaros has locked in a Cobra Clutch and is trying to pry a submission victory away his oppoenent. Uno is able to make it to the ropes and Zaros finally breaks the move at four, before dragging Uno to his corner and legally tagging Vlars back into the ring. Vlars grabs Uno by the back of the mask and runs him face first into the top turnbuckle in his corner, he then runs him into the adjacent corner, before tossing him across the ring by his mask. He slams Uno in the middle of the ring and tags in Zaros, who climbs to the top rope and waiting for Thing Uno to rise, hits a flying drop kick and goes for the cover. Mosca rushes in and breaks up the pinfall attempt, but while he argues with Doe, Zaros calls Vlars into the ring. Vlars picks up Zaros from behind, making it look like he’s going for an atomic drop, but drops Zaros down on Uno’s chest, butt first. Doe chases Vlars out of the ring while Zaros demands he count instead. This allows La Mosca Loca to slip in and hit a sitting Zaros with a super kick, before dashing out of the ring, menawhile Carlyle is angrily protesting the luchadore’s actions.
With both men down, the crowd starts to get behind Uno, who starts to crawl towards his corner. Zaros shakes the cobwebs from his head and tries to grab Thing Uno’s foot, but just misses as Uno makes the tag. Well rested Mosca enters and knock Zaros back down with a drop kick. He rushes across the apron and gets a receipt on Vlars, kicking him off the apron, before returning his attention to Zaros. A head scissor take over later and the “Tree Thugger” is sent sliding out of the ring by the lucha star. Vlars tries to charge in but Mosca pulls the top rope down and the bald man goes tumbling over the top rope as well. Mosca tags Uno back into the match and the two of them hit stereo suicide dives.
The crowd is hot as Mosca and Uno roll Zaros back into the ring. Uno rolls back in as well, but Vlars grabs Mosca by the back of the mask and rams him into the ring post. Back in the ring, Uno has went to the top rope, looking for a Flying Sunset Flip. Zaros crotches him on the top turnbuckle and tags Vlars in. Vlars grabs Uno in a kravat and pulls Uno out of the corner until only his toes are dangling on the top rope. He then drops down with a Stunner type manuever and goes for the cover, while Zaros insures that La Mosca Loca doesn’t make it back in the ring.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, Zaros and Vlars
Zaros tries to embrace his partner after the match, but Vlars simply walks away, grabbing his mop and bucket as he does. The announcers put over what a domoniant debut this was for Vlars and they wonder if he might possibly be able to win the Global Title tonight.
***
As we go back to Robert Fredrick’s office, Stradford points out there’s only four men left to compete. As Deedee picks the names, the announcers speculate over what the final combinations will be. The teams are True North Ant and Japanese terror, GRIM, versus GRIM’s old rival, Takeshi Morimoto and Easy E.
True North Ant, with Asper, and GRIM quickly make their way to ringside, as does Morimoto, but a commotion in the back leads to cameras following the noise. We find two hooded assailants attacking Easy E’s knee with lead pipes. They are quickly chased off by members of security and Easy E’s tag team partner, Sweet Daddy D, but the damage is already done.
Once again Robert Fredrick appears on the Charge Tron. He states that he suspects that Saul Asper had something to do with this, which a smiling Asper denies. Fredrick states this means they will have to use another one of the alternatives and quips that if Asper did have something to do with this, he might just be about to regret that decision.
Everyone at first is confused by this comment, until Eli Buchanan, dressed in a pair of jeans and running shoes, makes his way down to the ring. The crowd erupts, realizing what this means. Meanwhile Asper is irrate in the ring and complaining louldy to anyone who will listen over how unfair this decision is, which Carlyle quickly echoes.
MATCH 7
Lethal Lottery Match 6
True North Ant (w/ Saul Asper) and GRIM
vs
Takeshi Morimoto and Eli Buchanan
Asper has to run for his life as Eli and Morimoto slide into the ring and take the fight right to True North Ant and GRIM. Paul Carlyle continues to complain about what’s happening here and wonders why the BUAC would allow this to happen. Greg Stradford points out that this is the first time in nearly six years that GRIM, Takeshi Morimoto and Eli Buchanan have been in the same ring together and makes a point of informing us that years ago they were an upstart faction in BATTLE Japan called Fire Blood Clan before having a falling out.
Andrew Roller, obviously overcome by all the chaos here tonight, allows all four men to fight it out, realizing trying to gain a sense of order at this point is frivolous. The brawl spills out of the ring and in front of the announce table. By this point Asper has grabbed a headset and is demanding that Robert Fredrick be fired and he wants this match thrown out because Buchanan has no place being involved in it. He’s silenced as Eli tosses True North Ant across the table, taking both him and Asper out of the equation for the time being, much to the delight of the Minneapolis crowd.
Eli and Takeshi Morimoto toss GRIM into the ring and Roller finally gets a semblance of order back in the match, getting Eli to go to his team’s corner. Morimoto grabs GRIM, but has his eyes raked by his old rival. GRIM jabs his fingers into Morimoto’s throat and then drives a knee into his chest before finally taking him over with headlock. Takeshi appears to be having problems breathing and Roller makes sure that it isn’t a choke hold, forcing GRIM to release it. GRIM tags in True North Ant, who has managed to recover and the pair hit a double team body slam, before GRIM exits the ring.
Back at the announce table, Asper is complaining once again and demands Eli Buchanan be fined and suspended for assaulting him, reminding all of us that he is not a wrestler. Without warning Asper’s headset is turned off and he throws it down in frustration. He yells threats at Stradford, blaming him for this latest indignity, before going to his team’s corner while Carlyle berates Stradford a bit himself.
In the ring, True North Ant has tagged GRIM back in and hold Takeshi Morimoto while GRIM jabs in the belly with his taped fingers. GRIM begins working on his foe’s left knee, setting him up for the GRIM Lock. He tags True North Ant back in and holds Morimoto’s leg stretched out so TNA can get a huge splash on it. True North Ant continues the assault on Morimoto’s knee, but makes the mistake of letting him get up in hopes of hitting a Dragon Leg Whip. Instead Morimoto catches him with an enziguri to the side of the head, knocking the former ManitobANT silly. Morimoto starts crawling towards his corner, but GRIM gets back into the ring and grabs him by the foot. Morimoto kicks him off, right into True North Ant, and makes a last ditch effort to get to his corner, only to be stopped by both his opponents, who jump on top of him.
Asper lets out a sigh of relief as TNA and GRIM pull Morimoto back to their corner but it’s clear there is decension between the two of them, with TNA pushing GRIM in frustration. Asper yells at his client to keep his ego in check and stick to the plan. True North Ant reluctantly agrees and holds Morimoto as GRIM ascends to the top rope and goes for a double axehandle. Morimoto is able to get out of the way and True North Ant takes the brunt of the blow. GRIM tries to attack Morimoto but gets a reverse atomic drop and a stiff lariat clothesline for his trouble. He goes for a cover but rolls out of the way as TNA inadvertently drops an elbow on his partner. A shocked True North Ant gets caught with a lariat from Morimoto, who then stumbles into his corner and finally tags Eli Buchanan in.
The crowd erupts as The Last Dragon comes in and wastes little time taking the fight to his opponents. TNA takes a swing at him and Eli ducks, dropping him with a German suplex. GRIM suffers a similar fate as he tries to catch Eli with a Yakuza kick which Eli counters into an Exploder suplex. A second German suplex later and Eli signals for the end. He scoops GRIM up, looking for the Chaos Driver, but drops him as Saul Asper jumps up on the apron to distract him. True North Ant grabs Eli from behind and yells something at GRIM. GRIM clutches his throat and spits out the black mist but Eli manages to duck his head and True North Ant takes the brunt of it instead.
A stunned GRIM is speared by Takeshi Morimoto and rolls out of the ring. Morimoto and Eli looked at one another and smile. Eli picks a blinded True North Ant up into a vertical suplex, dropping the weight down onto Morimoto’s shoulders and the team hit their old finisher, a combination power bomb and neck breaker, which Stradford tells us they used to call “The Fire Driver”. Eli rolls on top of TNA for the cover and gets the three count.
Outside the ring an angry Saul Asper starts yelling at GRIM, who ignores him. The Japanese star waves Asper off and slowly backs away from the ring, never taking his eyes off his two enemies, who continue to celebrate in the ring.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, Takeshi Morimoto and Eli Buchanan
Asper takes a look at his fallen client in the ring, who is being tended to by trainers and marches to the back. Cameras follow him as he makes his way to Robert Fredrick’s office and barges in. He immediately demands to know why Eli Buchanan was allowed to compete. Fredrick replies that it was the BUAC’s decision that Eli Buchanan be permited to be second alternative in the the unlikely case two competitors both couldn’t compete. How was he or the Athletic Commision supposed to know that this would happen. He then smuggly tells Asper it’s too bad those two men chose to attack Easy E because perhaps the outcome of the match would have been different.
A fuming Asper is about to say something, when a finger taps him on the shoulder and he turns around to see Eli Buchanan standing there. Saul makes a hasty exit as Eli and Robert Fredrick share a chuckle. Eli thanks him for the opportunity and Robert Fredrick states it was lucky they caught him before he left, otherwise he would have missed out. Fredrick remind Eli this is his last opportunity, if he doesn’t win tonight he’s going to have a uphill battle to get back into championship contention. Eli simply nods his head and makes his exit to get his ring gear back on.
***
Back at the announce table Greg Stradford and Paul Carlyle go over what we’ve seen so far tonight and remind us that Battle Bowl is just moments away. Carlyle still complains Eli Buchanan shouldn’t have been able to compete but is confident it won’t really matter because all but one of Asper’s Army is in the battle royal. They then quickly list the twelve men that have advanced to Battle Bowl: Kraken, “Iron” Mack Brody, The Agents of Pain, Alan Hunter, The Technician, Cielo Guerrera, Sweet Daddy D, Zaros, Vlars, Takeshi Morimoto and Eli Buchanan.
***
We got to The Guru’s locker room where he’s offering his lone surviving client, The Technician, a pep talk. Saul Asper and his Army enter and the two managers warmly greet one another. Asper suggests it might be beneficial to The Guru if The Technician helps insure that Kraken wins the Global Championship tonight. The Guru seems flustered but The Technician assures his boss that he has no problem helping them out, pointing out how far back he and Brody, who he calls “Hoss”, went. He tells The Guru, “there will be other nights for us to bring home the title”, which pleases Saul Asper and the two managers shakes hands before Asper and his men leave.
After they leave The Technician and The Guru state talk it over further and The Guru tells him if the opportunity arises for him to win the title, he better go for it and Tech agree whole heartily.
***
It’s finally time for the main event and all the competitors start to make their way down to the ring. The Technician his manager come out with the member of Asper’s Army, making the announcers question whether they will truly turn on this power stable or not.
MATCH 8
BATTLE BOWL
Kraken vs “Iron” Mack Brody vs Agent B vs Agnet D vs Alan Hunter vs The Technician vs Cielo Guerrera vs Sweet Daddy D vs Zaros vs Vlars vs Takeshi Morimoto and Eli Buchanan
It’s clear right off the start that battle lines have been drawn. On one side is Asper’s Army and The Technician, on the other is Buchanan, Morimoto, Sweet Daddy D, Alan Hunter and Cielo Guerrera, with Vlars and Zaros standing in between.
Right off the opening bell, Zaros tries to hide behind the bald man he teamed with earlier tonight as the remaining contestant go right at each other. Vlars is having none of it however, as he grabs the surprised goblin and tosses him clear over the top rope before jumping in to the meelee.
Eliminated: Zaros
With Vlars’s inclusion, the heel side gets numbers advantage and they slowly start to wear the “good guys” down. The announcers remind us that all four members of Asper’s Army walked into Battle Bowl tonight with very little fatigue and it becomes clear that this is adding to their advantage. As valiant as those standing against them try, in the early goings it’s all “Team Asper”. A mistake by Vlars leads to his elimination as Sweet Daddy D side steps an attack and tosses him over the top rope, but he too is quickly eliminated as Kraken and Brody grab a hold of him and throw him to the arena floor.
Eliminated: Vlars, Sweet Daddy D
Buchanan and his allies try to fight back and it looks like they might get the adavantage back, as Kraken accidently splashes Agent B in the corner and then ist double DDT’ed by Hunter and Morimoto. It’s short lived however as Guerrera goes for a rana on The Technician, who manages to block it. He and Agent D pick Guerrera up over their heads and toss him to the arena floor, thus putting the advantage well with Team Asper’s grasp.
Eliminated: Cielo Guerrera
Greg Stradford states the obvious, that it looks like Asper is going to get his wish, and wonders what will happen once all the Army’s enemies are gone. Carlyle acts like this is a stupid question and that everyone else will eliminate themselves so Kraken can become Global Champion.
The heels overconfidence seems to be getting the better of them, as instead of trying to eliminate the remaining few men who oppose them, they continue to beat down on them instead. This choice comes back to haunt them as Brody misses a kick, catching Agent D in the side of the head. Takeshi Morimoto seizes the opportunity to clotheline D over the top rope. Moments later, Eli Buchanan does the same thing, clothesling Agent B out of the ring.
Eliminated: The Agents of Pain
The action seems to break down as Morimoto faces off with The Technician, Eli Buchanan with Kraken and Alan Hunter with Brody. Try as he might, Buchanan cannot move the much bigger Kraken, who swats him away levels him with a running body attack. Meanwhile The Technican is working over Morimoto. He sees an opportunity off to his right, as Hunter has Brody in the corner and is raining down blows from the middle row. He charges over and knocks Hunter over the top ope, dumping him to the arena floor.
Eliminated: Alan Hunter
Tech and Brody, who once teamed together as the Texas Wrecking Crew, turn their attention back to Morimoto, who does his best to fight them both off at once. Kraken tosses Eli Buchanan over the top rope and goes over to help the two of them in their attack. None of them notice Eli Buchanan has landed on the apron and slips back in the ring. He charges across the ring. Kraken manages to sidestep him, but Eli’s own momentum causes Brody and Morimoto to tumble over the top rope and to the floor. Stradford points out that it looks like The Technician saw him coming and pulled down the top rope so that those two could be eliminated, but Carlyle argues that it looked like he was just trying to get out of the way.
Elimanted: “Iron” Mack Brody and Takeshi Morimoto
With this there are only three men left. Much like Stradford, Kraken is suspisious that Tech’s actions were intentional, but masked matman denies it and points a blaming finger at Eli Buchanan. The two of them turn to face Eli, who realizes he accidently eliminated his last ally and is all alone. He tries to prepare himself for the coming onslaught, but has no time as Kraken and Tech attack, driving him into the corner and start lying the boots to him. Kraken whips Eli across the ring into the opposite corner, then whips Tech into him. The Technician whips Eli back out of the cornern and right into a big boot from Kraken. They pick him up and toss him over the top rope but Eli lands on the apron. Kraken and Tech charge, but Eli surprises them both with a desperation springboard cross body block, taking them both down in the process.
All three men are slow to get up. The Technician is the first to his feet. He grabs Eli by the hair but the redhaired warrior grabs him around the waist and hits a belly to belly suplex. Kraken comes at him but Eli sees him coming and catches him in the gut with a stiff knee strike, bringing the French Colossus to his knees. Eli goes for the Boyame but gets sideswiped by a forearm blow from The Technican, who grabs him from behind and calls to Kraken to hit him. Kraken charges in with a running clothesline, but Eli ducks and Tech gets knocked over the top rope and to the floor.
Eliminated: The Technician
Kraken stands there, momentarily stunned at what’s just transpired. He turns to Eli and takes a wild swing at him, but ducks and grabs Kraken around the waist. To the shock of Kraken, Asper and everyone else in the Target Centre, Eli lifts him up and hits a thunderous German suplex. Dazed, Kraken gets up and stumbles back into the ropes. Still trying to knock the cobwebs out of his head he doesn’t have time to block Eli Buchanan as he roars in with a lariat clothesline, that flips him over the top rope. The French Colossus bounces off the apron and land hard on the arena floor as the roof of the Target Centre comes unglued. Eli Buchanan has done it!
Winner: and the first ever PWGP Global Champion, “The Last Dragon” Eli Buchanan
The locker room empties out as Alan Hunter, The East K Connection, and several others enter the ring and celebrate with Eli on his big victory. Takeshi Morimoto is the last to greet the new champion and after a few words in Japanese, the two embrace and Morimoto raises the arm of his “ani”, his brother.
Robert Fredrick comes out, with his assistant, Deedee in tow. He formally awards Eli Buchanan the Pro Wrestling Grand Prix Global Championship, putting the belt on Eli himself. Eli is lifted on to the shoulders of Sweet Daddy D and Alan Hunter as the crowd cheers. “Battle Bowl” goes off the air with everyone in the Target Centre chanting Eli’s name.
With the card being so loaded, we go straight to our opening match.
MATCH 1
Television Title Match
Faititili (c) (6 points)
vs
Eli Buchanan (1 point)
As the bell rings and the two competitors shake hands, the announcers remind us that Eli Buchanan is not allowed to participate in the Lethal Lottery tonight because of his two losses to Kraken in recent weeks. Stradford suggest if Buchanan was to win the Television Title tonight it would be sort of a consolation prize, while Carlyle opening mocks Eli, calling him a choke artist.
In the opening moments of the match the offence goes back and forth, with both men getting in some of their trademark moves. A super kick by Faititili knocks Eli out of the ring, leading to a running dive by the Samoan warrior. Faititli would roll Eli back into the ring and went to the top rope, looking for the flying splash. Eli would manage to get to his feet and crotch him. He would climb to the middle rope and deliver an avalanche style belly-to-belly suplex, sending Faititli crashing in the middle of the ring. Buchanan would go for the pin but only get a two count. He would follow up with a series of German suplexes and go for another pin attempt after the fourth, but again only get a two count. Frustrated, Eli would go for the Chaos Driver, but Faititili would escape out the back and catch Eli with a headbutt followed by a super kick, which knocked Eli to the mat. Faititili would quickly ascend to the top rope and flew off looking for the splash, but Buchanan got his knees up and the Samoan warrior had the wind knocked out of him.
The crowd cheered and firmly got behind Eli as he climbed to his feet and wasted no time hitting the Boyame and going for the pinfall. It was at this moment Agents of Pain ran down to ringside and distracted referee, Andrew Roller. With Roller’s attention elsewhere, “Iron” Mack Brody would enter the ring and nearly take Eli Buchanan’s head off with a huge clothesline. With the crowd booing, Brody would drag Faititili on top of Buchanan and quickly make his exit. The Agents of Pain would back away from the ring, allowing Andrew Roller to turn around and make the three count.
Winner: and still Television Champion, Faititili (8 points)
Faititili looks confused as Roller hands him the Television Title. He looks at Eli, as he slowly gets to his feet. He sees Brody and the Agents of Pain standing on stage and realizes what’s happened. He apologizes to Eli and the camera picks up him offering Buchanan another shot at his title anytime. The two shake hands as we go to the back.
***
We go to the go to the locker room of Asper’s Army where Asper, Kraken and True North Ant are frilled with what has just occurred. Brody and the Agents arrive and the group celebrate together. Asper brags that they have all but destroyed Buchanan’s career at this point and tells the group with this last embarrassment they’re finally done with the Last Dragon.
It’s time for them to move forward, Asper states, telling the group to stick to their plan. Tonight will be their crowning achievement as they all make sure that Kraken walks out this evening as Global Champion. The group agrees and high five one another.
***
Elsewhere we find Eli and Faititili walking together. Faititilil once again tells Eli he can have another shot at the Television Title anytime he likes. BUAC Spokesman, Robert Fredrick enters and says Faititili might change his mind after he hears what he has to offer. Fredrick tells Eli it was unfortunante what happened to him tonight and promise him Asper’s Army will not be allowed to get away with this. He wishes Eli a good night and hopes he enjoys the rest of the show, before leaving with Faititili to discuss his proposal.
A dejected Eli is left shaking his head sadly. As he starts towards his locker room he passes a few stage hands who are discussing how an extra match was being added to the Lethal Lottery, taking the total number of participants up to twenty four. The stage hands suddenly realise Eli is standing there and quickly depart, leaving Eli looking completely dejected.
***
Down at ringside we find the announcers blown away by this news. Carlyle laughs, pointing out that now there are four more men who have an opportunity to become Global Champion and Eli Buchanan isn’t one of them.
He and Stradford turn their attention to Saul Asper making his way down to the ring with Kraken in tow. Stradford reminds us that due to Kraken’s victory on the debut episode of “Charge” four weeks ago, he is allowed to pick his own partner in the Lethal Lottery and the announcers wait with fainted breath to find out who his pick will be.
Asper grabs a mic and brags about how everything that has occurred over the last few weeks has went exactly how he planned and tonight the plan comes to its conclusion as Kraken becomes the first ever PWGP Global Champion. He announces that the gentleman who will help ensure everything continues to go as plan is his pick to be Kraken’s tag team partner, none other than “Iron” Mack Brody!
The announcer point out how great a move this is as Brody makes his way down to the ring. Not only is Brody a member of Asper’s Army, but these two have experience as a tag team and held tag team gold together in Japan. The two big men embrace once Brody gets in the ring and we wait to find out who their opponents will be.
Robert Fredrick appears on the “Charge Tron”, alongside his assistant, Deedee Gagnon. He congratulates Asper and Kraken on the wise choice and asks Deedee to draw the two names of their opponents. The first name drawn is Moondog Runt. The second is Thing Dos.
MATCH 2
Lethal Lottery Match 1
Kraken and “Iron” Mack Brody (w/ Saul Asper)
vs
Moondog Runt (w/ The Guru) and Thing Dos
Both men make their way down to the ring as the announcer point out how things continue to seem to go the way of Asper’s Army. Not only are neither of these men in the same league as Kraken or Brody, but they can’t stand one another, having feuded long before PWGP started on the air.
Right off the bell Kraken and Brody attack, tossing Runt out of the ring and concentrating their attention on Thing Dos. The two big men make a series of quick tags while beating Dos in their own corner with a body attacks and power moves. Moondog Runt manages to get back up in his corner, but seeing both his opponents eyeing him up, drops back down and leaves ringside as Kraken finishes Dos off with a devastating leg trap chokeslam and makes the cover for the easy three count.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, Kraken and “Iron” Mack Brody
The announcers point out that Kraken and Brody are walking away from this match in excellent shape, not fatigued in the least. Is anyone going to be able to stop them from completeing their plan here tonight?
***
Back to Robert Fredrick’s office and Deedee picks the next four participants. The first name picked, The Technician, and his partner for the match, Alan Hunter. Their opponents for the match, OH MY GOD, it’s Brutus Smith, and his tag team partner, the prodical son of Jimmy Jive, James Daniels.
MATCH 3
Lethal Lottery Match 2
The Technician (w/ The Guru) and Alan Hunter
vs
Brutus Smith and James Daniels
Daniels obviously feels like he’s one the lottery, pun inteneded, teaming up with the masked giant, Brute. He arogantly announces that he’s the team’s captain and tells the big man to get on the apron while he takes care of business. Smith just shakes his head and gets out of the ring while Daniels squares up with The Technician.
The announcers remind us that The Technician claims to be the greatest technical wrestler in the world and he seems intent on proving the point, quickly taking Daniels down with a hip toss, transitioned into a hammerlock. Daniels quickly makes it to the ropes, forcing the break and tags in Brute. As the giant enters, Tech tries to pick the leg, but Brute blocks it and chops him across the back. Screaming in pain, The Technician tags in Alan Hunter and rolls out of the ring.
Alan enters the ring and sizes up the giant. He decides to charge in, ducking a clothesline attempt from Smith and tries to chop away at the big man’s leg with a series of kicks. Brute manages to grab a hold of him and pushes him into the corner and starts lighting up his chest with a open hand slap to the chest, followed by a second. Daniels tags himself in and orders a confused Brutus Smith out of the ring, as he starts lying the boots into Hunter in the corner. He whips Hunter across the ring and rushes in looking for a clothesline. Hunter gets his foot up, catching Daniels in the face and then catches him a spin heel kick.
Both men are down and slowly make their ways to their seperate corner. Daniels reaches his first and slaps Brute on the chest, ordering him in the ring. Smith gets in the ring and looks intently at Daniels, who continues to yell at him to finish their opponents off for them. In response Smith grabs Daniels by the throat and chokeslams him in the centre of the ring. The big man exits the ring as The Technician steps in. He grabs Daniels in a front chancery and delivers a fisherman suplex, craddling him for the pinfall victory.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, The Technician and Alan Hunter
***
In Robert Fredrick’s office the next four Lethal Lottery particapants are drawn. It will be the seamonster, Vod, and Moondog Buster. Their opponents, Mexican cencation, Cielo Guerrera and Sweet Daddy D.
MATCH 4
Lethal Lottery Match 3
Vod and Moondog Buster (w/ The Guru)
vs
Cielo Guerrera and Sweet Daddy D
The Guru tries to keep the peace between Buster and Vod, reminding his client they need to work with Vod to advance to Battle Bowl. The two men seem recluctant to do so but agree.
The match starts off with Vod and Guerrera, and the luchadore quckly takes adavantage of his opponent’s lack of experince to hit a series of arm drags and a headscissors takeover. Guerrera tags in Sweet Daddy D and they whip Vod into the ropes, hitting a double hip toss on the seamonster.
Vod rolls to his corner and tags in Buster, who makes the mistake of rushing in and getting hip tossed by Sweet Daddy D. “The Sweetner” would body slam the larger man and tags Cielo back into the ring. Cielo hits an assisted backflip press and goes for the cover, only getting one. He picks Buster up and goes for another Irish whip, but Buster reverses and Vod pulls down the top rope, causing the luchadore to tumble to the arena floor.
Referee Jose Doe admonishing the monster for his actions but quickly finds himself trying to hold Buster back from going to attack Guerrera. Meanwhile, Vod drops down, and scooping the luchadore up, slams him on the floor. Sweet Daddy D tries to go stop this from happening, but Doe, not seening what has transpired, goes to stop him. This allows Vod and Buster to work over Guerrera outside the ring, driving him back first into the ring apron. Jose Doe finally catches on to what they’re doing and orders Vod back to his corner.
Buster rolls Guerrera back into the ring and tags in Vod. Vod scoops Buster up and slams him on the luchadore. The Moondog seems bothered by this but rolls out of the ring at the encouragement of his manager, as Vod goes for the cover and gets a two count. The seamonster hits a pendulum back breaker and presses down, looking for a submission victory. He tags Buster back into the ring and the Moondog hits an elbow drop while Vod hold Guerrera over his knee and goes for the pin. Sweet Daddy D rushes in the ring, however, and breaks up the count.
Vod is tagged back into the ring by Buster and the two of them whip Guerrea across the ring. They go for a double hip toss but Guerrera’s feet land on the top rope and he flips backwards on to his feet and superhumanly hits a arm drag on both men. With the crowd cheering him on he starts crawling towards Sweet Daddy D. Vod grabs his foot, but Guerrera counters with an enzuguri kick. Buster tries to hit a elbow drop, but Guerrera rolls out of the way and makes the tag.
Sweet Daddy D comes in like a house on fire, clotheslining both men. He catches Vod with an atomic drop sending him bumping into Buster, who falls out of the ring. Sweet Daddy D picks the leg on Vod and quickly locks in the Figure Four. Buster manages to get back in the ring to break up the submission attempt, but Cielo Guerrera is quick to drop kicks Buster into the corner. Guerrera and Sweet Daddy D hit a double super kick to Vod, who rolls out of the ring. “The Sky Warrior” doesn’t give him a chance to catches his breath, as he quickly hits a top rope plancha to take him out. Back in the ring Sweet Daddy D hits a body slam and climbs to the top rope and hits a flying elbow drop. He tags Cielo back in and drags Buster to their corner. Guerrera hits a breath-taking 630 Splash to secure the victory for the pair, as Sweet Daddy D stands guard.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, Cielo Guerrera and Sweet Daddy D
The two men celebrate in the ring as we watch Vod get up, holding his head. He slides into the ring after their opponents make their exit. Moondog Buster tries to get to his feet and Vod takes the opportunity to scoop him up and hits the Deep Six before exiting the ring and making his way to the back.
***
Back to Robert Fredrick’s office and another four men are about to be picked for the Lethal Lottery. It will be Bryant Adam Thompson and “High Five” Jimmy Jive vs The Agents of Pain.
The announcers can’t believe the lock of the draw for the Agents of Pain to have been picked together. They are speculating over what the odds of this must be when James Daniels suddenly comes out and attacks his father, Jimmy Jive, on his way to the ring with a chair. He hits several chair shots before Thompson has the chance to come to his partner’s aid.
Inside the ring, The Agents of Pain are more than pleased by what appears to have become a glorified handicap match, but Robert Fredrick appears on the Charge Tron and announces that the BUAC had a contigency plan in case something like this was to happen. He states that a list of alternatives was made in case of injury and he tells Thompson to meet his new partner, offering his apology as he does.
Goober the Gooker struts out and makes his way to the ring. Bryant Adam Thompson can’t believe his bad luck but doesn’t have a chance to do anything before The Agents of Pain attack him from behind and referee, Andrew Roller has no choice but call for the bell.
MATCH 5
Lethal Lottery Match 4
Bryant Adam Thompson and Goober the Gooker
vs
The Agents of Pain (Agent B and Agent D, w/ Saul Asper)
The Agents continue their double team assault on Thompson while Goober continues to strut slowly down to the ring. With Agent B calling the shots, he and Agent D work over Bryant, hitting a double team slingshot suplex and D goes for the cover. The Notorious B.A.T. kicks out but the Agents treat this as a personal insult and start stomping away. Andrew Roller tries to keep the Agents in line but they ignore his instructions as they continue to their assault. It’s only when he threatens to disqualify them that they take the threat serious and Agent B leaves the ring.
Goober finally gets up on the apron as Agent D hits a huge shoulder breaker on Bryant. He tags in B, who sets up for the Implant DDT, but Bryant manages to spin free and hit a surpries Pele kick to rock the agent. He tries to go for the tag, but B grabs him by the ankle and tags in D, who rushes in and stomps on Bryant’s back. The Agents hit another double suplex and decide to finish it. They whip Bryant into the ropes and go for the Flap Jack, but Bryant counters into a double DDT.
With the crowd cheering, Bryant crawls to this corner and makes the tag and Goober gets the biggest pop reaction from the crowd in his entire career. He charges in and hits a double clothesline. The turkey man slams Agent D, then slams B on top of him. He tosses B out of the ring and signals he’s going for the Crossface Turkey Wing. Asper chooses this time to jump up on the apron to distract Goober, which allows both Agents the opportunity to recover. D blindsides Goober with a running forearm and knocks Bryant off the apron. Agent B slides back into the ring and the pair hit the Flap Jack on Goober and get the three count.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, The Agents of Pain
After the match, Bryant rolls into the ring. The Agents quickly make their exit and head to the back with Asper. The announcers put over the fact that with this win, four of the five members of Asper’s Army are know in Battle Bowl. Carlyle says if there was a chance Kraken wouldn’t be walking out of tonight as Global Champion, it was all but gone now, and Stradford states this is a fact he finds hard to dispute now.
***
Robert Fredrick is wondering out loud how in the world Asper’s Army was able to be that lucky, with the Agents being drawn together as a team. His assistant, Deedee, shrugs her shoulders and offers to drawn the names for the next match. It will be Thing Uno and La Mosca Loca, another represenative of PWGP’s Mexican affliliate, AMLL, versus Zaros and Vlars. The two of them look confused as one another as neither of them know who Vlars is.
Down at ringside we soon find out, as the first three men all make their way down to ringside. Vlars is revealed to be the mysterious janitor carrying around the mop and bucket. Greg Stradford reveals that all we know about him is he claims to be “the puke bucket god”, but neither he or Paul Carlyle understand what that means.
MATCH 6
Lethal Lottery Match 5
La Mosca Loca and Thing Uno
vs
Zaros and Vlars
Zaros and Thing Uno start off the match going right after one another, with Uno getting the advantage. He tags in Mosca, who shows off some of the very same lucha skills we saw earlier in the show with Cielo Guerrera. Following a series of arm drags, “The Crazy Fly” tags Uno back into the ring and they hit a pair of somersault sentons and Uno goes for the cover. Zaros manages to kick out at two, then jabs a thumb in Uno’s eye, allowing him to tag in his partner.
The crowd isn’t sure what to make of the bald headed man as he first enters into the ring, but he quickly shows what he’s made of as he nearly takes Thing Uno’s head off with a clothesline. The so-called “puke bucket god” knocks Mosca off the apron with a cheap shot and while referee Jose Doe tries to keep the angered luchadore out of the ring, Vlars calls Zaros into and the goblin stomps away on Uno’s chest while Vlars stands on his throat.
Jose Doe finally sees what’s happened and orders one of them out of the ring and Vlars departs. Stradford points out there was no tag there, which Carlyle argues and states he’s starting to like this nutty janitor. Meanwhile Zaros has locked in a Cobra Clutch and is trying to pry a submission victory away his oppoenent. Uno is able to make it to the ropes and Zaros finally breaks the move at four, before dragging Uno to his corner and legally tagging Vlars back into the ring. Vlars grabs Uno by the back of the mask and runs him face first into the top turnbuckle in his corner, he then runs him into the adjacent corner, before tossing him across the ring by his mask. He slams Uno in the middle of the ring and tags in Zaros, who climbs to the top rope and waiting for Thing Uno to rise, hits a flying drop kick and goes for the cover. Mosca rushes in and breaks up the pinfall attempt, but while he argues with Doe, Zaros calls Vlars into the ring. Vlars picks up Zaros from behind, making it look like he’s going for an atomic drop, but drops Zaros down on Uno’s chest, butt first. Doe chases Vlars out of the ring while Zaros demands he count instead. This allows La Mosca Loca to slip in and hit a sitting Zaros with a super kick, before dashing out of the ring, menawhile Carlyle is angrily protesting the luchadore’s actions.
With both men down, the crowd starts to get behind Uno, who starts to crawl towards his corner. Zaros shakes the cobwebs from his head and tries to grab Thing Uno’s foot, but just misses as Uno makes the tag. Well rested Mosca enters and knock Zaros back down with a drop kick. He rushes across the apron and gets a receipt on Vlars, kicking him off the apron, before returning his attention to Zaros. A head scissor take over later and the “Tree Thugger” is sent sliding out of the ring by the lucha star. Vlars tries to charge in but Mosca pulls the top rope down and the bald man goes tumbling over the top rope as well. Mosca tags Uno back into the match and the two of them hit stereo suicide dives.
The crowd is hot as Mosca and Uno roll Zaros back into the ring. Uno rolls back in as well, but Vlars grabs Mosca by the back of the mask and rams him into the ring post. Back in the ring, Uno has went to the top rope, looking for a Flying Sunset Flip. Zaros crotches him on the top turnbuckle and tags Vlars in. Vlars grabs Uno in a kravat and pulls Uno out of the corner until only his toes are dangling on the top rope. He then drops down with a Stunner type manuever and goes for the cover, while Zaros insures that La Mosca Loca doesn’t make it back in the ring.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, Zaros and Vlars
Zaros tries to embrace his partner after the match, but Vlars simply walks away, grabbing his mop and bucket as he does. The announcers put over what a domoniant debut this was for Vlars and they wonder if he might possibly be able to win the Global Title tonight.
***
As we go back to Robert Fredrick’s office, Stradford points out there’s only four men left to compete. As Deedee picks the names, the announcers speculate over what the final combinations will be. The teams are True North Ant and Japanese terror, GRIM, versus GRIM’s old rival, Takeshi Morimoto and Easy E.
True North Ant, with Asper, and GRIM quickly make their way to ringside, as does Morimoto, but a commotion in the back leads to cameras following the noise. We find two hooded assailants attacking Easy E’s knee with lead pipes. They are quickly chased off by members of security and Easy E’s tag team partner, Sweet Daddy D, but the damage is already done.
Once again Robert Fredrick appears on the Charge Tron. He states that he suspects that Saul Asper had something to do with this, which a smiling Asper denies. Fredrick states this means they will have to use another one of the alternatives and quips that if Asper did have something to do with this, he might just be about to regret that decision.
Everyone at first is confused by this comment, until Eli Buchanan, dressed in a pair of jeans and running shoes, makes his way down to the ring. The crowd erupts, realizing what this means. Meanwhile Asper is irrate in the ring and complaining louldy to anyone who will listen over how unfair this decision is, which Carlyle quickly echoes.
MATCH 7
Lethal Lottery Match 6
True North Ant (w/ Saul Asper) and GRIM
vs
Takeshi Morimoto and Eli Buchanan
Asper has to run for his life as Eli and Morimoto slide into the ring and take the fight right to True North Ant and GRIM. Paul Carlyle continues to complain about what’s happening here and wonders why the BUAC would allow this to happen. Greg Stradford points out that this is the first time in nearly six years that GRIM, Takeshi Morimoto and Eli Buchanan have been in the same ring together and makes a point of informing us that years ago they were an upstart faction in BATTLE Japan called Fire Blood Clan before having a falling out.
Andrew Roller, obviously overcome by all the chaos here tonight, allows all four men to fight it out, realizing trying to gain a sense of order at this point is frivolous. The brawl spills out of the ring and in front of the announce table. By this point Asper has grabbed a headset and is demanding that Robert Fredrick be fired and he wants this match thrown out because Buchanan has no place being involved in it. He’s silenced as Eli tosses True North Ant across the table, taking both him and Asper out of the equation for the time being, much to the delight of the Minneapolis crowd.
Eli and Takeshi Morimoto toss GRIM into the ring and Roller finally gets a semblance of order back in the match, getting Eli to go to his team’s corner. Morimoto grabs GRIM, but has his eyes raked by his old rival. GRIM jabs his fingers into Morimoto’s throat and then drives a knee into his chest before finally taking him over with headlock. Takeshi appears to be having problems breathing and Roller makes sure that it isn’t a choke hold, forcing GRIM to release it. GRIM tags in True North Ant, who has managed to recover and the pair hit a double team body slam, before GRIM exits the ring.
Back at the announce table, Asper is complaining once again and demands Eli Buchanan be fined and suspended for assaulting him, reminding all of us that he is not a wrestler. Without warning Asper’s headset is turned off and he throws it down in frustration. He yells threats at Stradford, blaming him for this latest indignity, before going to his team’s corner while Carlyle berates Stradford a bit himself.
In the ring, True North Ant has tagged GRIM back in and hold Takeshi Morimoto while GRIM jabs in the belly with his taped fingers. GRIM begins working on his foe’s left knee, setting him up for the GRIM Lock. He tags True North Ant back in and holds Morimoto’s leg stretched out so TNA can get a huge splash on it. True North Ant continues the assault on Morimoto’s knee, but makes the mistake of letting him get up in hopes of hitting a Dragon Leg Whip. Instead Morimoto catches him with an enziguri to the side of the head, knocking the former ManitobANT silly. Morimoto starts crawling towards his corner, but GRIM gets back into the ring and grabs him by the foot. Morimoto kicks him off, right into True North Ant, and makes a last ditch effort to get to his corner, only to be stopped by both his opponents, who jump on top of him.
Asper lets out a sigh of relief as TNA and GRIM pull Morimoto back to their corner but it’s clear there is decension between the two of them, with TNA pushing GRIM in frustration. Asper yells at his client to keep his ego in check and stick to the plan. True North Ant reluctantly agrees and holds Morimoto as GRIM ascends to the top rope and goes for a double axehandle. Morimoto is able to get out of the way and True North Ant takes the brunt of the blow. GRIM tries to attack Morimoto but gets a reverse atomic drop and a stiff lariat clothesline for his trouble. He goes for a cover but rolls out of the way as TNA inadvertently drops an elbow on his partner. A shocked True North Ant gets caught with a lariat from Morimoto, who then stumbles into his corner and finally tags Eli Buchanan in.
The crowd erupts as The Last Dragon comes in and wastes little time taking the fight to his opponents. TNA takes a swing at him and Eli ducks, dropping him with a German suplex. GRIM suffers a similar fate as he tries to catch Eli with a Yakuza kick which Eli counters into an Exploder suplex. A second German suplex later and Eli signals for the end. He scoops GRIM up, looking for the Chaos Driver, but drops him as Saul Asper jumps up on the apron to distract him. True North Ant grabs Eli from behind and yells something at GRIM. GRIM clutches his throat and spits out the black mist but Eli manages to duck his head and True North Ant takes the brunt of it instead.
A stunned GRIM is speared by Takeshi Morimoto and rolls out of the ring. Morimoto and Eli looked at one another and smile. Eli picks a blinded True North Ant up into a vertical suplex, dropping the weight down onto Morimoto’s shoulders and the team hit their old finisher, a combination power bomb and neck breaker, which Stradford tells us they used to call “The Fire Driver”. Eli rolls on top of TNA for the cover and gets the three count.
Outside the ring an angry Saul Asper starts yelling at GRIM, who ignores him. The Japanese star waves Asper off and slowly backs away from the ring, never taking his eyes off his two enemies, who continue to celebrate in the ring.
Winners: advancing to Battle Bowl, Takeshi Morimoto and Eli Buchanan
Asper takes a look at his fallen client in the ring, who is being tended to by trainers and marches to the back. Cameras follow him as he makes his way to Robert Fredrick’s office and barges in. He immediately demands to know why Eli Buchanan was allowed to compete. Fredrick replies that it was the BUAC’s decision that Eli Buchanan be permited to be second alternative in the the unlikely case two competitors both couldn’t compete. How was he or the Athletic Commision supposed to know that this would happen. He then smuggly tells Asper it’s too bad those two men chose to attack Easy E because perhaps the outcome of the match would have been different.
A fuming Asper is about to say something, when a finger taps him on the shoulder and he turns around to see Eli Buchanan standing there. Saul makes a hasty exit as Eli and Robert Fredrick share a chuckle. Eli thanks him for the opportunity and Robert Fredrick states it was lucky they caught him before he left, otherwise he would have missed out. Fredrick remind Eli this is his last opportunity, if he doesn’t win tonight he’s going to have a uphill battle to get back into championship contention. Eli simply nods his head and makes his exit to get his ring gear back on.
***
Back at the announce table Greg Stradford and Paul Carlyle go over what we’ve seen so far tonight and remind us that Battle Bowl is just moments away. Carlyle still complains Eli Buchanan shouldn’t have been able to compete but is confident it won’t really matter because all but one of Asper’s Army is in the battle royal. They then quickly list the twelve men that have advanced to Battle Bowl: Kraken, “Iron” Mack Brody, The Agents of Pain, Alan Hunter, The Technician, Cielo Guerrera, Sweet Daddy D, Zaros, Vlars, Takeshi Morimoto and Eli Buchanan.
***
We got to The Guru’s locker room where he’s offering his lone surviving client, The Technician, a pep talk. Saul Asper and his Army enter and the two managers warmly greet one another. Asper suggests it might be beneficial to The Guru if The Technician helps insure that Kraken wins the Global Championship tonight. The Guru seems flustered but The Technician assures his boss that he has no problem helping them out, pointing out how far back he and Brody, who he calls “Hoss”, went. He tells The Guru, “there will be other nights for us to bring home the title”, which pleases Saul Asper and the two managers shakes hands before Asper and his men leave.
After they leave The Technician and The Guru state talk it over further and The Guru tells him if the opportunity arises for him to win the title, he better go for it and Tech agree whole heartily.
***
It’s finally time for the main event and all the competitors start to make their way down to the ring. The Technician his manager come out with the member of Asper’s Army, making the announcers question whether they will truly turn on this power stable or not.
MATCH 8
BATTLE BOWL
Kraken vs “Iron” Mack Brody vs Agent B vs Agnet D vs Alan Hunter vs The Technician vs Cielo Guerrera vs Sweet Daddy D vs Zaros vs Vlars vs Takeshi Morimoto and Eli Buchanan
It’s clear right off the start that battle lines have been drawn. On one side is Asper’s Army and The Technician, on the other is Buchanan, Morimoto, Sweet Daddy D, Alan Hunter and Cielo Guerrera, with Vlars and Zaros standing in between.
Right off the opening bell, Zaros tries to hide behind the bald man he teamed with earlier tonight as the remaining contestant go right at each other. Vlars is having none of it however, as he grabs the surprised goblin and tosses him clear over the top rope before jumping in to the meelee.
Eliminated: Zaros
With Vlars’s inclusion, the heel side gets numbers advantage and they slowly start to wear the “good guys” down. The announcers remind us that all four members of Asper’s Army walked into Battle Bowl tonight with very little fatigue and it becomes clear that this is adding to their advantage. As valiant as those standing against them try, in the early goings it’s all “Team Asper”. A mistake by Vlars leads to his elimination as Sweet Daddy D side steps an attack and tosses him over the top rope, but he too is quickly eliminated as Kraken and Brody grab a hold of him and throw him to the arena floor.
Eliminated: Vlars, Sweet Daddy D
Buchanan and his allies try to fight back and it looks like they might get the adavantage back, as Kraken accidently splashes Agent B in the corner and then ist double DDT’ed by Hunter and Morimoto. It’s short lived however as Guerrera goes for a rana on The Technician, who manages to block it. He and Agent D pick Guerrera up over their heads and toss him to the arena floor, thus putting the advantage well with Team Asper’s grasp.
Eliminated: Cielo Guerrera
Greg Stradford states the obvious, that it looks like Asper is going to get his wish, and wonders what will happen once all the Army’s enemies are gone. Carlyle acts like this is a stupid question and that everyone else will eliminate themselves so Kraken can become Global Champion.
The heels overconfidence seems to be getting the better of them, as instead of trying to eliminate the remaining few men who oppose them, they continue to beat down on them instead. This choice comes back to haunt them as Brody misses a kick, catching Agent D in the side of the head. Takeshi Morimoto seizes the opportunity to clotheline D over the top rope. Moments later, Eli Buchanan does the same thing, clothesling Agent B out of the ring.
Eliminated: The Agents of Pain
The action seems to break down as Morimoto faces off with The Technician, Eli Buchanan with Kraken and Alan Hunter with Brody. Try as he might, Buchanan cannot move the much bigger Kraken, who swats him away levels him with a running body attack. Meanwhile The Technican is working over Morimoto. He sees an opportunity off to his right, as Hunter has Brody in the corner and is raining down blows from the middle row. He charges over and knocks Hunter over the top ope, dumping him to the arena floor.
Eliminated: Alan Hunter
Tech and Brody, who once teamed together as the Texas Wrecking Crew, turn their attention back to Morimoto, who does his best to fight them both off at once. Kraken tosses Eli Buchanan over the top rope and goes over to help the two of them in their attack. None of them notice Eli Buchanan has landed on the apron and slips back in the ring. He charges across the ring. Kraken manages to sidestep him, but Eli’s own momentum causes Brody and Morimoto to tumble over the top rope and to the floor. Stradford points out that it looks like The Technician saw him coming and pulled down the top rope so that those two could be eliminated, but Carlyle argues that it looked like he was just trying to get out of the way.
Elimanted: “Iron” Mack Brody and Takeshi Morimoto
With this there are only three men left. Much like Stradford, Kraken is suspisious that Tech’s actions were intentional, but masked matman denies it and points a blaming finger at Eli Buchanan. The two of them turn to face Eli, who realizes he accidently eliminated his last ally and is all alone. He tries to prepare himself for the coming onslaught, but has no time as Kraken and Tech attack, driving him into the corner and start lying the boots to him. Kraken whips Eli across the ring into the opposite corner, then whips Tech into him. The Technician whips Eli back out of the cornern and right into a big boot from Kraken. They pick him up and toss him over the top rope but Eli lands on the apron. Kraken and Tech charge, but Eli surprises them both with a desperation springboard cross body block, taking them both down in the process.
All three men are slow to get up. The Technician is the first to his feet. He grabs Eli by the hair but the redhaired warrior grabs him around the waist and hits a belly to belly suplex. Kraken comes at him but Eli sees him coming and catches him in the gut with a stiff knee strike, bringing the French Colossus to his knees. Eli goes for the Boyame but gets sideswiped by a forearm blow from The Technican, who grabs him from behind and calls to Kraken to hit him. Kraken charges in with a running clothesline, but Eli ducks and Tech gets knocked over the top rope and to the floor.
Eliminated: The Technician
Kraken stands there, momentarily stunned at what’s just transpired. He turns to Eli and takes a wild swing at him, but ducks and grabs Kraken around the waist. To the shock of Kraken, Asper and everyone else in the Target Centre, Eli lifts him up and hits a thunderous German suplex. Dazed, Kraken gets up and stumbles back into the ropes. Still trying to knock the cobwebs out of his head he doesn’t have time to block Eli Buchanan as he roars in with a lariat clothesline, that flips him over the top rope. The French Colossus bounces off the apron and land hard on the arena floor as the roof of the Target Centre comes unglued. Eli Buchanan has done it!
Winner: and the first ever PWGP Global Champion, “The Last Dragon” Eli Buchanan
The locker room empties out as Alan Hunter, The East K Connection, and several others enter the ring and celebrate with Eli on his big victory. Takeshi Morimoto is the last to greet the new champion and after a few words in Japanese, the two embrace and Morimoto raises the arm of his “ani”, his brother.
Robert Fredrick comes out, with his assistant, Deedee in tow. He formally awards Eli Buchanan the Pro Wrestling Grand Prix Global Championship, putting the belt on Eli himself. Eli is lifted on to the shoulders of Sweet Daddy D and Alan Hunter as the crowd cheers. “Battle Bowl” goes off the air with everyone in the Target Centre chanting Eli’s name.