Post by Office on Sept 10, 2016 16:01:30 GMT -5
In the dark match, Blake Mitchell and Aria Price defeated Asterio and Aine when Mitchell used the Space Needle Drop on Asterio.
"Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns n Roses plays over some video highlights of past Lion's Road events. Among those prominently featured are Robb Daniels, Ben Chrenshaw, Corey Cruelty, Kenshin Takamura, Matt Pulver, The Agents of Pain, Mark Storm, Hammerstein. The package ends with Robb Daniels holding his King of the Lions title high. The scene opens into the control room with Mandeville Nelson standing beside Blitz, the Seattle Seahawks mascot.
MANDEVILLE NELSON: Greetings from the Lion's Road! Welcome to Mane Event! My name is Mandeville Nelson and tonight, Lion's Road Pro-Wrestling is in Seattle for Mane Event! If you couldn't tell by the thing beside me... Blitz! The Seattle Seahawks mascot himself! We have a great main event as the Streak defend their Pride titles against the Essential in what is sure to be a good one!
Blitz nods.
MANDEVILLE NELSON: And both Heritage Champion Corey Cruelty and number one contender Mark Storm will be in action! Plus! The funeral of Hammerstein as hosted by Eli Buchanan, I'm not too excited about that but I hear you're going to be apart of it, Blitz?
Blitz nods again, throwing his football from hand to hand.
MANDEVILLE NELSON: Alright! I understand we've got White Phoenix and Reginald Hamilton making their entrances as we speak, so let's take a quick break and we'll come back with that match!
JAKE AARONS: This opening match is schedule for one fall with a ten minute time limit! In the red corner from London, England! He weighs in at two hundred pounds... REGINALD HAMILTON!
Not much of a reaction.
JAKE AARONS: His opponent in the blue corner comes from Parts Unknown! He weighs in at two hundred and twenty seven pounds... WHITE PHOENIX!
Phoenix raises his arm to a decent reaction from the crowd.
JAKE AARONS: Your referee for this contest is Xavier Price!
The bell sounds and they circle about briefly before a tie-up occurs, Phoenix arm drags Hamilton down to the mat and both men pop back up to their feet at the same time. Hamilton cracks a smile as he wipes away his shoulder, perhaps trying to tell the White Phoenix that he'll have to do better than that. The two engage in a lock-up once again, Phoenix does a quick go behind using the size difference to his advantage but Hamilton does a quick standing switch. This doesn't last for long as Phoenix does a standing switch of his own to wind up behind Hamilton again. Hamilton grabs the arm and tries to apply an arm wringer instead, but Phoenix grabs the ropes to break the hold.
BASTIAN KRULL: White Phoenix was able to vanquish AJ Knight last week, earning himself a bit of redemption from the Heritage title eliminator battle royal last month. His good feelings were short lived though as Kris Slade, fresh off a tough loss to Julian Cutlass showed up and powerbombed Phoenix through a table. There was no rhyme or reason behind it, and Slade isn't the type of guy to be on social media so this last week has been full of questions. Was Phoenix a target or was he just in the wrong place at the wrong time?
CHAD GOMEZ: It's Kris Slade - who knows?
Phoenix and Hamilton engage in another collar and elbow tie-up, Phoenix backs Hamilton in the ropes and offers up a clean break, but Hamilton slaps him! Phoenix replies with a European uppercut! Hamilton staggers out in the middle of the ring and Phoenix knee lifts him before dropping him with a neckbreaker! Phoenix makes a cover!
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2-KICK OUT!
Phoenix drags Hamilton up to his feet and sends him into the ropes before leaping onto the adjacent ropes and clocking the running Reginald Hamilton with a springboard back elbow. Hamilton falls down to a knee, Phoenix grabs him up and clutches both wrists and dropkicks him into the chest to complete the Blow Out and send him careening into the turnbuckles. Phoenix walks up, kicks him in the gut and double underhooks the arms... TIGER DRIVER! Reginald Hamilton is driven Into Ashes! Phoenix covers!
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3!
Phoenix gets up, and quickly turns to the entrance aisle. He continues looking around before Price raises his arm in victory, but there's no sign of Kris Slade. Phoenix drops out of the ring and heads to the back, still pretty cautious.
CHAD GOMEZ: If it was a calculated attack, Kris Slade has got inside White Phoenix's head!
BASTIAN KRULL: Yes, but it didn't hinder his in ring performance as he made short work of newcomer Reginald Hamilton!
The feed cuts backstage to find Heritage Champion Corey Cruelty, out of the shadows for once, and strolling down a hallway in the company of his manager and girlfriend, Cassie Dark. As the pair make their way to a nearby locker room, they get intercepted by Lion's Road reporter Becky Chande. Microphone in hand, the short blonde approaches the couple, offering them a smile in the hopes of making either half break character. The attempt is futile, as both Corey and Cassie look as grave as ever, so Becky simply moves on to her question:
BECKY CHANDE: Corey, you stand here this evening as the longest-reigning Heritage Champion in Lions' Road history, and with Mark Storm as your next contender. Both of you will be in non-title action tonight, and many are wondering...
To Becky's surprise, Corey cuts her off by placing a hand over the microphone. He then leans in and begins to speak into it himself:
COREY CRUELTY: Becky...you are right. The Prince of Darkness will be having a non-title match. But unlike Storm, he will not be coasting. He will not be assuming a win even before entering the ring. Hell, the Prince of Darkness says, give his opponent tonight a title shot! Why not? The Prince of Darkness will be treating this match as seriously as if it were a title shot, anyway.
Corey glowers into the camera intensely as he continues:
COREY CRUELTY: You see, the Prince of Darkness doesn't distinguish between opponents, or relax his performance when there are no stakes. An undefeated singles streak is not something to take lightly, and the Prince of Darkness is certainly not about to let his end in a moment of over-confidence. When the Prince of Darkness goes out there in a few moments, you can expect the same intensity, the same commitment, as if the match were for this belt.
Corey pats the Heritage title around his shoulder as he adds:
COREY CRUELTY: Besides, Becky, you, the Prince of Darkness, Lady Dark, and all the people watching tonight know...that shot or no shot...the result of this match will be the same. The Prince of Darkness will deliver Oblivion to whoever's in the ring with him...and then...
The glare returns, just as intense as before.
COREY CRUELTY: ...then, Becky...
...they will join...
...me...
...in...
...darkness.
With this, the Prince of Darkness collects his bride and walks off, leaving Becky to gaze after them with a somewhat maternal smile as the feed returns to ringside where "Bad Guy" by Jordon Comoli is halfway through as we come back from break, Mark Storm howls on the apron before climbing into the ring.
JAKE AARONS: This match is set for one fall with a ten minute time limit. Already in the ring from Corvallis, Oregon! He weighs in at one hundred and eighty one pounds... JOEY BAILEY! His opponent from Brooklyn, New York! He weighs in at two hundred and twenty pounds! MARK STORM!
Storm leaps onto the turnbuckle and raises his arms.
JAKE AARONS: Your referee for this contest is Darnell Cane!
Mark Storm locks up with Joey Bailey, the veteran wrestler from Corvallis, Oregon. Bailey quickly takes Storm over to the mat with a side headlock, but the number one contender to the Heritage title uses headscissors to break free of the headlock. Bailey twists his body, bringing Storm to a seated position while he still has the headscissors applied and does a headstand to break free of the scissors. Bailey drops down to his feet and is immediately monkey flipped over by Storm! Both men get back to their feet and engage in a collar and elbow tie-up, Bailey scoops Storm onto his shoulders with a fireman's carry... or makes him think he's going to, before taking him down to the mat with a single leg takedown. Bailey backs off and applauds himself for his efforts, Mark Storm doesn't look too impressed though as he pulls himself back to his feet.
BASTIAN KRULL: Mark Storm will take on Corey Cruelty in two weeks for the Heritage title, and his opponent Joey Bailey is the same height as the Heritage Champion as both are 6'1" while there is a thirty pound difference between Bailey and Cr--
CHAD GOMEZ: That kid can claim he's two hundred and ten pounds all he wants, but I'd be surprised if he was one ninety.
BASTIAN KRULL: If that's the case, then there's not much difference between the two opponents for Mark Storm. The styles are very different - Bailey is a technical based fighter employing a lot of the Japanese Jr. Heavyweight techniques. A style that Mark Storm is familiar with. Corey Cruelty is a more of a brawler.
They lock-up again and Bailey pulls a side headlock, but Storm quickly cradles him to the mat with a pin!
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2-KICK OUT!
Storm gets up and quickly goes from a side headlock into a standing hammerlock, then reaches down and trips Bailey to the mat. Storm leaps up and applies a grounded side headlock, begins hammering away with right hands. Despite this, Joey Bailey is able to get up to his feet with Storm still hanging on. Storm delivers another punch and then rams Bailey head first into the top turnbuckle! Bailey falls against the turnbuckles and Storm leaps onto the second rope, wraps his legs around Bailey's head and neck and nails him with the reverse huracanrana! Bailey pops up from the momentum and Storm is quick... grabbing him up, dropping him back down... knee to the head! DYSTOPIA! Count it referee!
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3!
After his arm is raised by Darnell Cane, Storm exits the ring and heads to the announce desk where he is handed a microphone. He takes a moment and soaks in the cheers and applause from the audience, nodding his head in appreciation before pausing and bringing the microphone closer to his lips.
MARK STORM: Preparation, is everything.
He declared, pausing to allow heavy exhales to ensue, before continuing.
MARK STORM: Fail to prepare, prepare to fail. That's what my gym teacher used to tell me in high school, and heck, despite my negative thoughts on the guy - that's stuck to me till this very day. You've gotta be prepared for the best but also be prepared for the worst. And I've been doing this dance for quite some time now. I've had some good times, plenty of them but I've also had a hell of a lot of bad times, too. But those bad times, they happened for a reason. I believe that everything happens for a reason, and through those bad times, those purple patches, I've gotten stronger. And right now, in this very moment.. I am the strongest I've ever been in my career. And I'm prepared for anything, and anyone. To be more specific, I'm prepared for mister Corey Cruelty. I'll give it to you Corey, in the short time you've been in this profession you've caused quite the stir now, haven't you? I mean, you've defeated guys with much more experience in comparison to yourself, as well as contested with some of the best this promotion has to offer. You're young, have the Heritage title in your possession, and have a bright future ahead of you. Right now, you're going through a real good patch, hell, you're killing it right now. But all good things, must come to an end, you'll learn that if you haven't already. And what I'm talking about, is your championship reign buddy because as you know, you'll be defending that title against me.
Applause and cheers softly ring through the arena and Storm nods his head, looking around, with a smirk appearing upon his lips.
MARK STORM: And sure, you've faced some good guys.. but you've faced, no one - like me. I'm not your generic carbon copy. I don't care about the boos or the cheers, what matters to me... is the beautiful art of fighting, Corey. What matters to me, is dismantling my opponents, limb by limb before emotionally eradicating them. What matters to me, is being the best at what I do.
There's another pause, as he allows the audience to applaud after he finished his sentence.
MARK STORM: Nobody does it like me, Corey but you'll learn that too.. in due time, kid. In due time.
Dropping the microphone, Bad Guy by Jordan Comoli blares through the speakers and Storm raises his arms and makes his exit.
AMERICA~!
AMERICA~!
JAKE AARONS: This next contest is set for one fall with a ten minute time limit. Introducing first from Minneapolis, Minnesota! He weighs in at two hundred and twenty nine pounds... BRODY HOWITZER!
Brody Howitzer walks out of the lion's mouth as "America! Fuck Yeah!" hits. He raises his airsoft M4 Carbine into the air as red, white and blue lights flicker behind him. He fires the weapon off, giving a brief Rambo-esque battle cry before running down the aisle and sliding into the ring. His weapon is taken by a stage hand and he tells them it better be waiting for him in his locker room!
JAKE AARONS: His opponent from Puerto Rico! He weighs in at two hundred and five pounds... ADAM ADONIS!
Breaking Point's "One of a Kind" hits as a spotlight shines on the lion's mouth, Adam Adonis emerges and scouts the crowd before he smirks. He then walks down the aisle and slides into the ring.
JAKE AARONS: Your referee for this contest is Xavier Price.
Howitzer and Adonis circle about the ring briefly before looking as though they're going to engage in a collar and elbow tie-up, but Howitzer knees him in the gut right before they do dropping the Puerto Rican down to his knees. He pulls him up and throws him directly into the ring post, then pulls him out and backs him into the turnbuckles. Howitzer pulls him by the arm into a lariat and then drags him back up, clamps on a headlock and bulldogs him to the mat! Howitzer makes a very sloppy lateral press and only gets a one count, which prompts him to argue with Price's count and you know what's coming...
XAVIER PRICE: WOW DUDE!
The fans pop as Howitzer shakes his head, Adonis gets up and fires off a couple shots into his midsection but Howitzer uses the knee to the gut again to drop him back down to his knees. Howitzer grabs him and tries to drop him across his knee, but Adonis elbows his way out of it! He turns, grabs Howitzer and hoists him up... then back down! OLYMPIC SLAM! The B Movie Actor lands hard, but tries to scramble to his feet. That's OK by Adonis though as he rolls out onto the apron and stands up, grabbing the top rope and leaps into the ring... SPRINGBOARD CLOTHESLINE! He takes Howitzer down in a hurry and jumps on top for the cover!
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KICK OUT!
CHAD GOMEZ: Would you call this a grudge match?
BASTIAN KRULL: Uh... not really.
CHAD GOMEZ: OK, good. Brody Howitzer was telling me before his bout that when he paid Adam Adonis for protection in the battle royal, he was hoping that Adonis would get the job done properly. He gambled what he had to try and earn a Heritage title match and thus more money, but Adonis dropped the ball and let Howitzer get eliminated. So while this may not be a grudge match, it's certainly about revenge! And trying to recoup losses.
Adonis pulls Howitzer to his feet and clamps on a side headlock, but it doesn't take long for him to be shot off into the ropes. Adonis comes back looking for a superman punch, but Howitzer tries to do the Matrix dodge and... well, dodges it, but falls on the ground. Adonis gets up, looking a bit confused and walks over to pull Howitzer up to a vertical base but Howitzer pushes him back into the corner. Brody Howitzer tries to fire off a big right, but Adonis blocks it... REVERSE STO INTO THE CORNER! Howitzer slumps from the top, to the middle and to the mat as Adonis drags him out and covers!
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KICK OUT!
Howitzer kicks out and manages to get up to his feet, but Adonis greets him with a Mongolian chop. Howitzer yells something about not liking Mongolians, so Adonis gives him a European uppercut... Howitzer says he doesn't think much of them either. Adonis tries for a Polish Hammer, but Howitzer ducks, yelling that Poland is in Europe as he does. He turns and nails Adonis with a lariat! Excuse me... an American lariat. Adonis goes down, but struggles back to his feet. Howitzer tries to grab him, but Adonis punches him in the bread basket. Howitzer leans over, gasping for air. Adonis senses this is his chance and pulls him in for a powerbomb, but Howitzer punches away and lands on his feet. Adonis charges... Howitzer dodges, but tries to set him up for the Michael Bay Special. Adonis elbows his way out of it! Howitzer falls to his knees and Adonis tries to reel him in for the Too Low to Register piledriver, but Howitzer yells about his pants being pulled. Price goes to check and the B Movie Actor drives the back of his head into Adonis' groin. Adonis backs off in pain and Howitzer scoops him up... WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT! The cross-legged Tombstone connects! He falls on top for the cover!
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BASTIAN KRULL: Brody Howitzer steals one! A good back and forth match marred by poor sportsmanship as the B lister has to resort to that kind of tactic to escape with the win, I'm not a fan of that.
CHAD GOMEZ: Do you think he should've fought fair in "Alien Zombies Mutilated My Mother in Law"? Would that have been ideal?
BASTIAN KRULL: I have no idea what you're talking about.
CHAD GOMEZ: Watch a good movie once in a while, Bas. Jeez.
Howitzer quickly rolls out of the ring and is handed his airsoft gun, which he shoots a few times in the air as a celebratory gesture.
JAKE AARONS: This match is set for one fall with a ten minute time limit! Introducing first from Corvallis, Oregon! Weighing in at one hundred and ninety four pounds... TONY BENTLY! His opponent...
The lights dim and lightning effects dart across the venue as the blast beats and jagged vocals of Avenged Sevenfold's "Darkness Surrounding" echo throughout the studio. After a moment or two, the heavy part kicks in and a sombre figure emerges in a longer duster jacket with his head bowed low. Corey Cruelty poses in the lion's mouth, arms forming an X over his crotch before he slowly makes his way down to the ring.
JAKE AARONS: From Duluth, Minnesota! He weighs in at two hundred and ten pounds! COREY CRUELTY!
Jake Aarons doesn't get to finish his introductions as Tony Bently looks to make a name for himself early as he jumps the Heritage Champion before he's even fully in the ring, Aarons scrambles to get out as Bently whips Cruelty into the ropes, but Cruelty comes back with a running knee that flips Bently down to the mat. Bently scrambles up and runs right into some forearm shots! Bently is backed into the ropes and Cruelty headbutts him in the mush! Bently grabs his mouth in pain but Cruelty kicks him in the gut, then piledrives him into the mat! Cruelty sits and watches Bently crumble to the mat knowing that Oblivion means 1-2-3. He rolls on top and referee Brian Shelzi confirms that with his count.
BASTIAN KRULL: Wow! Tony Bently is no slouch at all, and Corey Cruelty quickly turned the tides on an early attack and made very short work of him! That Oblivion piledriver continues to be a dangerous move for the young man.
CHAD GOMEZ: I'm impressed. He's proven to have some skills beyond his years. He's amassed two title defenses already and looking to score his third in two weeks against Mark Storm, something that would earn him a King of the Lions title shot but he said last week that he's not interested in that title just yet. He's young, he wants to make the Heritage title something special and build his experience with each and every defense. I can admire that. Mark Storm better not overlook him.
We return from break to find a casket in the middle of the ring, surrounded by flowers and a black wreath and off to the side if a large unflattering photo of Jacob Hammerstein. A church organ begins playing and a group of "mourners" begin making their way down the aisle, including a man pushing a hotdog cart, Blitz - the Seattle Seahawks mascot, a Pollo Bucket delivery driver and a clown couple wearing Hawaiian shirts.
CHAD GOMEZ: I wonder if I can get the delivery guy to run and get me some popcorn chicken.
BASTIAN KRULL: The restaurant is right next door!
CHAD GOMEZ: Hey man, I was a delivery driver when I was a teenager. There's people far lazier than that out there.
"Killing is My Business" by Megadeth hits and the crowd begins booing. Agents D and B come out, each accompanied by a woman in tiny black dresses making zero effort to look sad. They make their way past the other mourners and enter the ring, making sure to hold the ropes open for their companions. As the music fades out, the lid to the casket flies open and everyone jumps back... only for Eli Buchanan to sit up with a giant shit eating grin on his face. Eli Buchanan climbs out to reveal he is dressed as a priest, holding an urn in his arms. He's met with a loud chorus of boos as he high fives each of his Agents and they all share a laugh. After a moment, Eli walks over to a pulpit and sits the urn down in front of him.
ELI BUCHANAN: Ladies and gentlemen, thank you all for joining us tonight as mourn the loss of Leader of Hammerhead Nation, Jacob Angela Seymour Hammerstein.
CHAD GOMEZ: His middle name was Angela?!
ELI BUCHANAN: I would like to personally thank Jacob’s parents for joining us tonight.
Eli points to the clowns, who wave to the crowd.
ELI BUCHANAN: They flew all the way in from Why, Arizona, and boy are their arms tired.
The crowd lets out a collective groan at the terrible joke, but the Agents are cackling madly!
ELI BUCHANAN: Jacob was a good man. Yes, he was dumb as a shit load of brick and twice as ugly. His taste in fashion and women both left a lot to be desired and his singing voice literally made people projectile vomit.
The Agents nod, and pretend to lose their cookies just thinking about it.
ELI BUCHANAN: But he was a good man. He will be missed by his friends and loved ones, both of which are lying in hospital beds at the moment, as well by all the restaurants who he single handedly kept in business.
Eli points at the hotdog vendor, who’s still selling his wares to the crowd.
ELI BUCHANAN: That’s Murray, he followed Jacob everywhere just to sell him hotdogs and Murray has asked me to inform all of you, solely because of Jacob Hammerstein, he will be able to send his children to any college they want.
This is met with a mixed reaction from the crowd but a chant of “Murray” breaks out and the hotdog vendor waves to the crowd.
ELI BUCHANAN: Yes, well done Murray, well done. Now it’s unfortunate for Jacob that he was not as generous and loyal to those close to him, as he was to all his friends down at Pollo Bucket and many of its competitors. If he was, perhaps he would be standing with us today, instead of finding his bodily remains in this.
He holds up the urn and laughs as he’s met with another chorus of boos.
ELI BUCHANAN: Now, my colleges, Agents D and B, were going to say a few words, but they’re too filled with grief...
The two goons pretend to cry and are comforted by their dates.
ELI BUCHANAN: So instead we present to you this lovely video in tribute...
“I Will Remember You” by Sarah McLachlan plays as we see clips of Hammerstein’s matches in Pollomania and Lion’s Road, most of which is him stumbling around in the ring and getting beaten up. As the song ends we see the events that transpired following the match between Team S.H.I.T. and the Agents of Pain, ending with the Agents holding Hammerstein’s arms while Eli throws a fireball in his face. As we come back from the video package the crowd boos, while Eli and the Agents of Pain are laughing in the middle of the ring.
ELI BUCHANAN: Let what happened to poor Jacob Hammerstein be a lesson to you all. If you turn down an offer to join Buck U Productions...
He opens the urn and raises it over his head.
ELI BUCHANAN: You get burnt!
He turns the urn over in his hand, expecting ashes to pour out but nothing comes out. Visibly confused, he looks at the Agents before reaching into the urn, pulls something out and looks at it. His face goes pale and he drops it to the ground.
CHAD GOMEZ: That's...
BASTIAN KRULL: A Tiger Mask.
CHAD GOMEZ: Almost a year ago, Eli Buchanan was wearing that mask when one of his signature fireballs ended up in his face! How did that get in there?!
The crowd is left confused as Eli yells at the Agents, who can only shrug at him, before he hastily exits the ring and rushes off to the back with his men following behind him, half dragging their dates with them. Eli Buchanan stops at the announce desk and demands answers, but Gomez and Krull cannot offer him anything. The mourners begin exiting and Blitz, the Seahawks mascot begins chucking Seahawks merch out into the crowd. Buchanan marches up to him and yells, demanding he stop throwing trash at the fans which earns quite a bit of boos. Buchanan grabs the remaining merch and throws it in the garbage. Blitz hangs his head in shame. The former Tiger Mask Red turns to leave and Blitz takes off his head... Buchanan looks up on the video wall and sees that Blitz is... HAMMERSTEIN?!
CHAD GOMEZ: What!?
Hammer chucks the Blitz head at Buchanan like a dodgeball, knocking him to the ground. The Agents come rushing back out, standing guard over Buchanan as he gets back to his feet. They pull their angry manager away to the back as Hammerstein slides into the ring, a little difficult to do in the mascot costume and begins knocking over his casket and then smashes the picture of himself over the ring post as we go to commercial.
We return from break with the main even competitors all standing inside the ring awaiting Jake Aarons official introductions...
JAKE AARONS: Ladies and gentlemen! This is your main event of the evening scheduled for one fall with a thirty minute time limit! Introducing first the challengers! At a combined weight of four hundred and forty seven pounds... the Iron Champion Ben Chrenshaw! And the King of the Lions Champion Robb Daniels! THEY ARE THE ESSENTIAL!
The fans in Mane Event Studios shower the champions with boos.
JAKE AARONS: Their opponents at a combined weight of four hundred and four pounds... they are the current, reigning and defending Pride Champions... Matt Pulver! Kenshin Takamura! THE STREAK!
While the good guys earn a favourable reaction.
JAKE AARONS: Your referee for this contest is Cordell Garner!
Garner finishes checking over all four men as Jake Aarons exits the ring. The Essential's starting man is Robb Daniels up against Matt Pulver of the Streak! The two men engage in a collar and elbow tie-up and despite Pulver's best efforts to plant his feet and prevent it, the King of the Lions Champion backs him into the corner. Garner calls for a clean break, but Daniels waits until four to break and Pulver angrily shoves Daniels back in response to that. Daniels has a good chuckle with Chrenshaw about that before he meets Pulver back in the centre of the ring and locks up again. The result remains the same as Daniels once more muscles Pulver back toward the corner. Matt Wrestling kicks off the turnbuckle and spins them both around, arm dragging Daniels to the mat. Daniels gets up slowly and mockingly applauds Pulver to draw his ire. The youngster doesn't look too impressed by the antics of the World Champion and rushes to lock-up with him. Pulver grabs an arm wringer and twists it tight. Daniels in response reaches around Pulver's face and fishhooks his mouth! He pulls Pulver down into a doubled over position and knees him in the gut before throwing him back. Pulver falls to the mat in a seated position and Daniels dusts his hands off while sharing another laugh with Chrenshaw. Kenshin Takamura can be heard telling Matt Pulver not too lose his cool, but the Swedish Fish gets up and once again, the World Champion and he engage in a collar and elbow tie up. Daniels Irish whips him right out of it! Pulver hits the ropes and ducks Daniels' attempt at a lariat, hitting the opposite side and waylaying the King of the Lions with a single leg dropkick! Daniels goes down and rolls out of the ring drawing Ben Chrenshaw into the match via automatic tag. Chrenshaw tries to get the jump on Pulver, but he's nailed with a leaping enzuigiri! With the Iron Champion down on one knee, Pulver grabs his arm and drags him over to Takamura and the Japanese sensation tags in.
BASTIAN KRULL: The Essential believe that the Streak are a team just waiting to crack. There may be some good insight behind that because they started off as a promising trio and were fractured before they really even got a chance to begin when Jack Rose was attacked and put out of action. Takamura and Pulver managed to march on without their ally and were able to win the Pride titles without him.
CHAD GOMEZ: Yeah, but you know in the back of their minds that the whole Jack Rose situation just irks them. They don't know who did it! They'd love to say the Essential did it, but there's been no proof to support that theory.
Takamura backs Chrenshaw into the ropes and then hip throws him with the O Goshi and follows it up with a cross armbreaker! Chrenshaw scrambles to the ropes and even goes as far to get his body halfway out of the ring, but Takamura drags him back inside and releases the hold before quickly reapplying it as a way to circumvent the rules of the rope break. Daniels tries to jump back in to save his partner, but Pulver rushes into the ring and prevents that from happening. In the commotion, Takamura releases the armbreaker and drags Chrenshaw to his feet. Both he and Pulver back the singles champions into opposite corners and whip them out into each other! Both men roll out of the ring!
BASTIAN KRULL: Both singles champions wise to roll out of the ring after that exchange. They butted heads and fans at home, you'd be surprised how many three count falls I've seen come off of that. It doesn't look like much, but it can knock you out.
Chrenshaw slithers back into the ring and locks up with the Tokyo Tiger. Despite Takamura gaining an arm wringer on him, Chrenshaw kicks him in the knee and drop toe holds him down to the mat. He leaps up into a side headlock position, but Takamura scoots out of it and applies a grounded hammerlock! Chrenshaw reaches out for the ropes, Lauren Parker-Daniels tries to push the rope toward him but gets admonished by Garner for doing so. He threatens to throw her out if he catches her doing anything else, she raises her arms in innocence as Mane Event goes to commercial.
Chrenshaw backs Takamura into the ropes and knees him in the gut a few times before sending him out. The Iron Champion nails a calf kick on Takamura that knocks him back into the ropes, Chrenshaw gets up and tags Daniels in before drop toe holding Kenshin to the mat. Daniels runs up and knee drops Takamura in the back of the head! He rolls him over!
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KICK OUT!
Daniels grabs Takamura up by the hair and pulls him to his feet. He jaw jacks with the fans for a few moments before hoisting Takamura into the air and snaps him back down to the mat with a suplex! He floats over!
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Takamura gets a shoulder up! Daniels quickly gets up, dragging Takamura with him and tags the Iron Champion back into the match. Chrenshaw barks an order and Daniels nods, the duo whip Takamura off the ropes and Daniels hoists him in the air with a spinebuster... bringing him down across Chrenshaw's knee! Daniels exit as Chrenshaw drops down for a lateral press!
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Pulver breaks up the pin! Referee Cordell Garner gets up and tries to force Pulver back to his corner, but Chrenshaw is milking this situation for all its worth - antagonizing the youngster. Chrenshaw dumps Takamura to the floor and Pulver tries to charge him again, but Garner has to physically restrain him as he didn't see the automatic tag take place. Daniels pulls Takamura up on the floor and shoots him into the guardrail! Daniels rolls him back into the ring. Pulver is finally forced back onto the apron and Chrenshaw grabs Takamura's leg and begins kicking it, he tries to turn Takamura over but the Tokyo Tiger reaches up! Lauren Parker-Daniels leaps onto the apron as Takamura small packages Chrenshaw! Garner misses this as he's busy throwing her out! The fans count for him though!
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3-Daniels breaks up the phantom pin anyway. Security whisks the first lady of Lion's Road away, but the Essential have got away with another one. Chrenshaw pulls Takamura to his feet and tries for a body slam, but Takamura slips out and runs him into the ropes. Daniels blind tags and Takamura gives Chrenshaw an O'Connor Roll! He has him pinned, but Garner says he isn't the legal man! Daniels runs in and nails the unsuspecting Takamura with a swinging neckbreaker! The King of the Lions gets up and points at Pulver, who glares back in response. Daniels pulls Takamura up and whips him into the ropes. Daniels doubles over and eats a face full of boot for that, he blindly staggers over and makes the tag to Chrenshaw while Takamura is down and looking for Pulver!
BASTIAN KRULL: Kenshin Takamura has been in there since the early moments of the match, Matt Pulver should've been the legal man a few minutes earlier but referee Cordell Garner has to see a tag take place - automatic or otherwise - for it to count. So while Takamura was thrown to the floor, the Essential were wise to do what they did and get him back in the ring before Garner could see what they'd done.
Chrenshaw stomps on Takamura's thigh, ordering him to get up and asking if he's had enough. He grabs Takamura's leg and throws it up into the air, driving the knee back down into the mat. Chrenshaw steps on it and then steps over it, putting all his weight down on the leg. Takamura rolls away into a corner but unfortunately for him it's a neutral corner. Chrenshaw runs and drives his knee into Takamura's midsection while in the corner, he repeats this several times before grabbing Takamura's head and trying to plant one there. Takamura blocks it, pushes Chrenshaw back and clocks him with the rolling elbow known as the Tsunami Crash! Chrenshaw spills to the mat and Takamura collapses. He scratches and claws his way to the corner, tagging in Matt Pulver! Pulver hops in, greeting Daniels with a right hand! Chrenshaw somehow staggers to his feet and Pulver snaps off a Northern Lights suplex! Daniels gets back up... DROPKICK! Daniels falls into the corner! Chrenshaw is trying to pull himself up in the corner... Pulver runs up, grabs a waist lock... GERMAN SUPLEX! Daniels charges Pulver, hoisting him up as if to go for an Alabama Slam style spinebuster. Pulver wiggles free, slips down the back... SUNSET FLI--Daniels isn't coming down! Takamura dives into the ring... TSUNAMI CRASH TO THE WORLD CHAMPION! Daniels goes down, Pulver transitions into the Alligator Clutch!
1...
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2...
...
3!!!
Pulver leaps into the air in excitement, knowing what he just did. He jumps on Kenshin Takamura, who falls to the mat too exhausted to support his partner's weight! The two exchange a hug on the ground as Pulver rolls out of the ring and leaps onto the guardrail, raising his arms. Suddenly, a fan strikes Pulver!
CHAD GOMEZ: Did a fan just hit him!?
Pulver falls off the guardrail onto the venue's hardwood floor. Alexander Irvine stands up with a smile and slowly climbs over the guardrail. Like a predator, he slowly approaches Pulver who is crawling away and doesn't see the Unnatural stalking behind him. Irvine begins warming up his arm for the Battle Cry.
BASTIAN KRULL: Oh, come on! You're supposed to be a sportsman, Irvine!
The crowd is reaching a fever pitch, but it gets louder as Julian Cutlass sprints down to the ring as he stops in front of his partner. Kenshin Takamura is leaning over the middle rope, exhausted but watching the scene. The Essential have gathered their wits about them, also watching the drama unfold. With Cutlass and Irvine engaged in a standoff, Takamura drops out of the ring and lifts up Pulver. Pulver is surprised to see that it was Irvine who struck him, and becomes incensed. Takamura and referee Cornell Garner restrain him as Alexander Irvine and Julian Cutlass are locked, eye to eye. Becky Chande slowly approaches the two men and sticks a microphone between them.
JULIAN CUTLASS: ...the hell are you doing?
ALEXANDER IRVINE: Oh, you know... just scouting the competition.
JULIAN CUTLASS: Don't patronize me. This is what THEY want, Alex... all the top brass, the fat chicken in their cushioned chairs. This isn't wrestling! They're trying to suck you into their world, but this isn't how we settle things.
ALEXANDER IRVINE: How do we settle things, Jule?
The crowd roars with an immense pop and even the Streak and the Essentials, having put their match behind them, exchange glances among one another as Julian Cutlass and Alexander Irvine stand silently before one another, sizing one another up. A Cold War with two great superpowers and the rest of the world watching, waiting for one of them to flinch.
JULIAN CUTLASS: You want to do it this way?
ALEXANDER IRVINE: You tell me.
Irvine wears a smirk on his face. The crowd is having a fit and anyone paying attention can see that he is thriving off of their energy. Cutlass is angry, almost solemn, that they’re on the verge of a showdown. Seemingly every member of the front row has their head in their hands and their mouth agape. Children wearing Black Lion’s Road gear can be seen mouthing “oh my God, oh my God, oh my God…” Chrenshaw and Daniels both seem slightly amused while Takamura is trying to settle Pulver down again. The entire arena is waiting for the ring to go nuclear. Cutlass turns his head to the side. For a moment he closes his eyes in thought and then trains his gaze back on Irvine.
JULIAN CUTLASS: So be it.
The crowd hoops and holler as the fans begin stomping on their seats, sending a metallic shudder throughout the venue.
JULIAN CUTLASS: But it's going down in there.
Cutlass points to the ring.
JULIAN CUTLASS: Next week!
The fans pop huge as Cutlass brushes past Chande and walks to the back. Irvine stands triumphantly, smirking and winks at Pulver before making his own exit.
BASTIAN KRULL: Cutlass vs. Irvine next week! The Black Lion's Road explodes!
Pulver grabs his belt and rushes to the back. Chrenshaw and Daniels pass Takamura in the aisle, each man on either side of him. Takamura eyes both men, not sure what to make of this... but they both nod and laugh and walk by. Kenshin Takamura doesn't look too impressed by it.
BASTIAN KRULL: Fans, we are out of time here on Mane Event! Big things happening in our final moments! The Streak retain their titles, Matt Pulver pins Robb Daniels which in past situations has led to a title shot. Alexander Irvine struck Matt Pulver once again, bringing out Julian Cutlass and both member's of Black Lion's Road have agreed to face off in singles competition right here next week in Vancouver - Cutlass' new place of residence. It's going to be big! Don't miss it!
OPENING SEGMENT
"Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns n Roses plays over some video highlights of past Lion's Road events. Among those prominently featured are Robb Daniels, Ben Chrenshaw, Corey Cruelty, Kenshin Takamura, Matt Pulver, The Agents of Pain, Mark Storm, Hammerstein. The package ends with Robb Daniels holding his King of the Lions title high. The scene opens into the control room with Mandeville Nelson standing beside Blitz, the Seattle Seahawks mascot.
MANDEVILLE NELSON: Greetings from the Lion's Road! Welcome to Mane Event! My name is Mandeville Nelson and tonight, Lion's Road Pro-Wrestling is in Seattle for Mane Event! If you couldn't tell by the thing beside me... Blitz! The Seattle Seahawks mascot himself! We have a great main event as the Streak defend their Pride titles against the Essential in what is sure to be a good one!
Blitz nods.
MANDEVILLE NELSON: And both Heritage Champion Corey Cruelty and number one contender Mark Storm will be in action! Plus! The funeral of Hammerstein as hosted by Eli Buchanan, I'm not too excited about that but I hear you're going to be apart of it, Blitz?
Blitz nods again, throwing his football from hand to hand.
MANDEVILLE NELSON: Alright! I understand we've got White Phoenix and Reginald Hamilton making their entrances as we speak, so let's take a quick break and we'll come back with that match!
WHITE PHOENIX BATTLES REGINALD HAMILTON WHEN WE RETURN!
JAKE AARONS: This opening match is schedule for one fall with a ten minute time limit! In the red corner from London, England! He weighs in at two hundred pounds... REGINALD HAMILTON!
Not much of a reaction.
JAKE AARONS: His opponent in the blue corner comes from Parts Unknown! He weighs in at two hundred and twenty seven pounds... WHITE PHOENIX!
Phoenix raises his arm to a decent reaction from the crowd.
JAKE AARONS: Your referee for this contest is Xavier Price!
The bell sounds and they circle about briefly before a tie-up occurs, Phoenix arm drags Hamilton down to the mat and both men pop back up to their feet at the same time. Hamilton cracks a smile as he wipes away his shoulder, perhaps trying to tell the White Phoenix that he'll have to do better than that. The two engage in a lock-up once again, Phoenix does a quick go behind using the size difference to his advantage but Hamilton does a quick standing switch. This doesn't last for long as Phoenix does a standing switch of his own to wind up behind Hamilton again. Hamilton grabs the arm and tries to apply an arm wringer instead, but Phoenix grabs the ropes to break the hold.
BASTIAN KRULL: White Phoenix was able to vanquish AJ Knight last week, earning himself a bit of redemption from the Heritage title eliminator battle royal last month. His good feelings were short lived though as Kris Slade, fresh off a tough loss to Julian Cutlass showed up and powerbombed Phoenix through a table. There was no rhyme or reason behind it, and Slade isn't the type of guy to be on social media so this last week has been full of questions. Was Phoenix a target or was he just in the wrong place at the wrong time?
CHAD GOMEZ: It's Kris Slade - who knows?
Phoenix and Hamilton engage in another collar and elbow tie-up, Phoenix backs Hamilton in the ropes and offers up a clean break, but Hamilton slaps him! Phoenix replies with a European uppercut! Hamilton staggers out in the middle of the ring and Phoenix knee lifts him before dropping him with a neckbreaker! Phoenix makes a cover!
1...
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2-KICK OUT!
Phoenix drags Hamilton up to his feet and sends him into the ropes before leaping onto the adjacent ropes and clocking the running Reginald Hamilton with a springboard back elbow. Hamilton falls down to a knee, Phoenix grabs him up and clutches both wrists and dropkicks him into the chest to complete the Blow Out and send him careening into the turnbuckles. Phoenix walks up, kicks him in the gut and double underhooks the arms... TIGER DRIVER! Reginald Hamilton is driven Into Ashes! Phoenix covers!
1...
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2...
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3!
Phoenix gets up, and quickly turns to the entrance aisle. He continues looking around before Price raises his arm in victory, but there's no sign of Kris Slade. Phoenix drops out of the ring and heads to the back, still pretty cautious.
CHAD GOMEZ: If it was a calculated attack, Kris Slade has got inside White Phoenix's head!
BASTIAN KRULL: Yes, but it didn't hinder his in ring performance as he made short work of newcomer Reginald Hamilton!
HERITAGE TITLE NUMBER ONE CONTENDER MARK STORM IN ACTION AFTER THE BREAK!
The feed cuts backstage to find Heritage Champion Corey Cruelty, out of the shadows for once, and strolling down a hallway in the company of his manager and girlfriend, Cassie Dark. As the pair make their way to a nearby locker room, they get intercepted by Lion's Road reporter Becky Chande. Microphone in hand, the short blonde approaches the couple, offering them a smile in the hopes of making either half break character. The attempt is futile, as both Corey and Cassie look as grave as ever, so Becky simply moves on to her question:
BECKY CHANDE: Corey, you stand here this evening as the longest-reigning Heritage Champion in Lions' Road history, and with Mark Storm as your next contender. Both of you will be in non-title action tonight, and many are wondering...
To Becky's surprise, Corey cuts her off by placing a hand over the microphone. He then leans in and begins to speak into it himself:
COREY CRUELTY: Becky...you are right. The Prince of Darkness will be having a non-title match. But unlike Storm, he will not be coasting. He will not be assuming a win even before entering the ring. Hell, the Prince of Darkness says, give his opponent tonight a title shot! Why not? The Prince of Darkness will be treating this match as seriously as if it were a title shot, anyway.
Corey glowers into the camera intensely as he continues:
COREY CRUELTY: You see, the Prince of Darkness doesn't distinguish between opponents, or relax his performance when there are no stakes. An undefeated singles streak is not something to take lightly, and the Prince of Darkness is certainly not about to let his end in a moment of over-confidence. When the Prince of Darkness goes out there in a few moments, you can expect the same intensity, the same commitment, as if the match were for this belt.
Corey pats the Heritage title around his shoulder as he adds:
COREY CRUELTY: Besides, Becky, you, the Prince of Darkness, Lady Dark, and all the people watching tonight know...that shot or no shot...the result of this match will be the same. The Prince of Darkness will deliver Oblivion to whoever's in the ring with him...and then...
The glare returns, just as intense as before.
COREY CRUELTY: ...then, Becky...
...they will join...
...me...
...in...
...darkness.
With this, the Prince of Darkness collects his bride and walks off, leaving Becky to gaze after them with a somewhat maternal smile as the feed returns to ringside where "Bad Guy" by Jordon Comoli is halfway through as we come back from break, Mark Storm howls on the apron before climbing into the ring.
JAKE AARONS: This match is set for one fall with a ten minute time limit. Already in the ring from Corvallis, Oregon! He weighs in at one hundred and eighty one pounds... JOEY BAILEY! His opponent from Brooklyn, New York! He weighs in at two hundred and twenty pounds! MARK STORM!
Storm leaps onto the turnbuckle and raises his arms.
JAKE AARONS: Your referee for this contest is Darnell Cane!
Mark Storm locks up with Joey Bailey, the veteran wrestler from Corvallis, Oregon. Bailey quickly takes Storm over to the mat with a side headlock, but the number one contender to the Heritage title uses headscissors to break free of the headlock. Bailey twists his body, bringing Storm to a seated position while he still has the headscissors applied and does a headstand to break free of the scissors. Bailey drops down to his feet and is immediately monkey flipped over by Storm! Both men get back to their feet and engage in a collar and elbow tie-up, Bailey scoops Storm onto his shoulders with a fireman's carry... or makes him think he's going to, before taking him down to the mat with a single leg takedown. Bailey backs off and applauds himself for his efforts, Mark Storm doesn't look too impressed though as he pulls himself back to his feet.
BASTIAN KRULL: Mark Storm will take on Corey Cruelty in two weeks for the Heritage title, and his opponent Joey Bailey is the same height as the Heritage Champion as both are 6'1" while there is a thirty pound difference between Bailey and Cr--
CHAD GOMEZ: That kid can claim he's two hundred and ten pounds all he wants, but I'd be surprised if he was one ninety.
BASTIAN KRULL: If that's the case, then there's not much difference between the two opponents for Mark Storm. The styles are very different - Bailey is a technical based fighter employing a lot of the Japanese Jr. Heavyweight techniques. A style that Mark Storm is familiar with. Corey Cruelty is a more of a brawler.
They lock-up again and Bailey pulls a side headlock, but Storm quickly cradles him to the mat with a pin!
1...
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2-KICK OUT!
Storm gets up and quickly goes from a side headlock into a standing hammerlock, then reaches down and trips Bailey to the mat. Storm leaps up and applies a grounded side headlock, begins hammering away with right hands. Despite this, Joey Bailey is able to get up to his feet with Storm still hanging on. Storm delivers another punch and then rams Bailey head first into the top turnbuckle! Bailey falls against the turnbuckles and Storm leaps onto the second rope, wraps his legs around Bailey's head and neck and nails him with the reverse huracanrana! Bailey pops up from the momentum and Storm is quick... grabbing him up, dropping him back down... knee to the head! DYSTOPIA! Count it referee!
1...
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2...
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3!
After his arm is raised by Darnell Cane, Storm exits the ring and heads to the announce desk where he is handed a microphone. He takes a moment and soaks in the cheers and applause from the audience, nodding his head in appreciation before pausing and bringing the microphone closer to his lips.
MARK STORM: Preparation, is everything.
He declared, pausing to allow heavy exhales to ensue, before continuing.
MARK STORM: Fail to prepare, prepare to fail. That's what my gym teacher used to tell me in high school, and heck, despite my negative thoughts on the guy - that's stuck to me till this very day. You've gotta be prepared for the best but also be prepared for the worst. And I've been doing this dance for quite some time now. I've had some good times, plenty of them but I've also had a hell of a lot of bad times, too. But those bad times, they happened for a reason. I believe that everything happens for a reason, and through those bad times, those purple patches, I've gotten stronger. And right now, in this very moment.. I am the strongest I've ever been in my career. And I'm prepared for anything, and anyone. To be more specific, I'm prepared for mister Corey Cruelty. I'll give it to you Corey, in the short time you've been in this profession you've caused quite the stir now, haven't you? I mean, you've defeated guys with much more experience in comparison to yourself, as well as contested with some of the best this promotion has to offer. You're young, have the Heritage title in your possession, and have a bright future ahead of you. Right now, you're going through a real good patch, hell, you're killing it right now. But all good things, must come to an end, you'll learn that if you haven't already. And what I'm talking about, is your championship reign buddy because as you know, you'll be defending that title against me.
Applause and cheers softly ring through the arena and Storm nods his head, looking around, with a smirk appearing upon his lips.
MARK STORM: And sure, you've faced some good guys.. but you've faced, no one - like me. I'm not your generic carbon copy. I don't care about the boos or the cheers, what matters to me... is the beautiful art of fighting, Corey. What matters to me, is dismantling my opponents, limb by limb before emotionally eradicating them. What matters to me, is being the best at what I do.
There's another pause, as he allows the audience to applaud after he finished his sentence.
MARK STORM: Nobody does it like me, Corey but you'll learn that too.. in due time, kid. In due time.
Dropping the microphone, Bad Guy by Jordan Comoli blares through the speakers and Storm raises his arms and makes his exit.
AFTER THESE WORDS FROM OUR SPONSORS - BRODY HOWITZER TAKES ON ADAM ADONIS!
AMERICA~!
AMERICA~!
JAKE AARONS: This next contest is set for one fall with a ten minute time limit. Introducing first from Minneapolis, Minnesota! He weighs in at two hundred and twenty nine pounds... BRODY HOWITZER!
Brody Howitzer walks out of the lion's mouth as "America! Fuck Yeah!" hits. He raises his airsoft M4 Carbine into the air as red, white and blue lights flicker behind him. He fires the weapon off, giving a brief Rambo-esque battle cry before running down the aisle and sliding into the ring. His weapon is taken by a stage hand and he tells them it better be waiting for him in his locker room!
JAKE AARONS: His opponent from Puerto Rico! He weighs in at two hundred and five pounds... ADAM ADONIS!
Breaking Point's "One of a Kind" hits as a spotlight shines on the lion's mouth, Adam Adonis emerges and scouts the crowd before he smirks. He then walks down the aisle and slides into the ring.
JAKE AARONS: Your referee for this contest is Xavier Price.
Howitzer and Adonis circle about the ring briefly before looking as though they're going to engage in a collar and elbow tie-up, but Howitzer knees him in the gut right before they do dropping the Puerto Rican down to his knees. He pulls him up and throws him directly into the ring post, then pulls him out and backs him into the turnbuckles. Howitzer pulls him by the arm into a lariat and then drags him back up, clamps on a headlock and bulldogs him to the mat! Howitzer makes a very sloppy lateral press and only gets a one count, which prompts him to argue with Price's count and you know what's coming...
XAVIER PRICE: WOW DUDE!
The fans pop as Howitzer shakes his head, Adonis gets up and fires off a couple shots into his midsection but Howitzer uses the knee to the gut again to drop him back down to his knees. Howitzer grabs him and tries to drop him across his knee, but Adonis elbows his way out of it! He turns, grabs Howitzer and hoists him up... then back down! OLYMPIC SLAM! The B Movie Actor lands hard, but tries to scramble to his feet. That's OK by Adonis though as he rolls out onto the apron and stands up, grabbing the top rope and leaps into the ring... SPRINGBOARD CLOTHESLINE! He takes Howitzer down in a hurry and jumps on top for the cover!
1...
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2...
KICK OUT!
CHAD GOMEZ: Would you call this a grudge match?
BASTIAN KRULL: Uh... not really.
CHAD GOMEZ: OK, good. Brody Howitzer was telling me before his bout that when he paid Adam Adonis for protection in the battle royal, he was hoping that Adonis would get the job done properly. He gambled what he had to try and earn a Heritage title match and thus more money, but Adonis dropped the ball and let Howitzer get eliminated. So while this may not be a grudge match, it's certainly about revenge! And trying to recoup losses.
Adonis pulls Howitzer to his feet and clamps on a side headlock, but it doesn't take long for him to be shot off into the ropes. Adonis comes back looking for a superman punch, but Howitzer tries to do the Matrix dodge and... well, dodges it, but falls on the ground. Adonis gets up, looking a bit confused and walks over to pull Howitzer up to a vertical base but Howitzer pushes him back into the corner. Brody Howitzer tries to fire off a big right, but Adonis blocks it... REVERSE STO INTO THE CORNER! Howitzer slumps from the top, to the middle and to the mat as Adonis drags him out and covers!
1...
...
2...
KICK OUT!
Howitzer kicks out and manages to get up to his feet, but Adonis greets him with a Mongolian chop. Howitzer yells something about not liking Mongolians, so Adonis gives him a European uppercut... Howitzer says he doesn't think much of them either. Adonis tries for a Polish Hammer, but Howitzer ducks, yelling that Poland is in Europe as he does. He turns and nails Adonis with a lariat! Excuse me... an American lariat. Adonis goes down, but struggles back to his feet. Howitzer tries to grab him, but Adonis punches him in the bread basket. Howitzer leans over, gasping for air. Adonis senses this is his chance and pulls him in for a powerbomb, but Howitzer punches away and lands on his feet. Adonis charges... Howitzer dodges, but tries to set him up for the Michael Bay Special. Adonis elbows his way out of it! Howitzer falls to his knees and Adonis tries to reel him in for the Too Low to Register piledriver, but Howitzer yells about his pants being pulled. Price goes to check and the B Movie Actor drives the back of his head into Adonis' groin. Adonis backs off in pain and Howitzer scoops him up... WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT! The cross-legged Tombstone connects! He falls on top for the cover!
1...
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2...
...
3!
BASTIAN KRULL: Brody Howitzer steals one! A good back and forth match marred by poor sportsmanship as the B lister has to resort to that kind of tactic to escape with the win, I'm not a fan of that.
CHAD GOMEZ: Do you think he should've fought fair in "Alien Zombies Mutilated My Mother in Law"? Would that have been ideal?
BASTIAN KRULL: I have no idea what you're talking about.
CHAD GOMEZ: Watch a good movie once in a while, Bas. Jeez.
Howitzer quickly rolls out of the ring and is handed his airsoft gun, which he shoots a few times in the air as a celebratory gesture.
DON'T GO AWAY! HERITAGE CHAMPION COREY CRUELTY IN SINGLES ACTION UP NEXT!
JAKE AARONS: This match is set for one fall with a ten minute time limit! Introducing first from Corvallis, Oregon! Weighing in at one hundred and ninety four pounds... TONY BENTLY! His opponent...
The lights dim and lightning effects dart across the venue as the blast beats and jagged vocals of Avenged Sevenfold's "Darkness Surrounding" echo throughout the studio. After a moment or two, the heavy part kicks in and a sombre figure emerges in a longer duster jacket with his head bowed low. Corey Cruelty poses in the lion's mouth, arms forming an X over his crotch before he slowly makes his way down to the ring.
JAKE AARONS: From Duluth, Minnesota! He weighs in at two hundred and ten pounds! COREY CRUELTY!
Jake Aarons doesn't get to finish his introductions as Tony Bently looks to make a name for himself early as he jumps the Heritage Champion before he's even fully in the ring, Aarons scrambles to get out as Bently whips Cruelty into the ropes, but Cruelty comes back with a running knee that flips Bently down to the mat. Bently scrambles up and runs right into some forearm shots! Bently is backed into the ropes and Cruelty headbutts him in the mush! Bently grabs his mouth in pain but Cruelty kicks him in the gut, then piledrives him into the mat! Cruelty sits and watches Bently crumble to the mat knowing that Oblivion means 1-2-3. He rolls on top and referee Brian Shelzi confirms that with his count.
BASTIAN KRULL: Wow! Tony Bently is no slouch at all, and Corey Cruelty quickly turned the tides on an early attack and made very short work of him! That Oblivion piledriver continues to be a dangerous move for the young man.
CHAD GOMEZ: I'm impressed. He's proven to have some skills beyond his years. He's amassed two title defenses already and looking to score his third in two weeks against Mark Storm, something that would earn him a King of the Lions title shot but he said last week that he's not interested in that title just yet. He's young, he wants to make the Heritage title something special and build his experience with each and every defense. I can admire that. Mark Storm better not overlook him.
STAY TUNED FOR THE FUNERAL OF HAMMERSTEIN!
We return from break to find a casket in the middle of the ring, surrounded by flowers and a black wreath and off to the side if a large unflattering photo of Jacob Hammerstein. A church organ begins playing and a group of "mourners" begin making their way down the aisle, including a man pushing a hotdog cart, Blitz - the Seattle Seahawks mascot, a Pollo Bucket delivery driver and a clown couple wearing Hawaiian shirts.
CHAD GOMEZ: I wonder if I can get the delivery guy to run and get me some popcorn chicken.
BASTIAN KRULL: The restaurant is right next door!
CHAD GOMEZ: Hey man, I was a delivery driver when I was a teenager. There's people far lazier than that out there.
"Killing is My Business" by Megadeth hits and the crowd begins booing. Agents D and B come out, each accompanied by a woman in tiny black dresses making zero effort to look sad. They make their way past the other mourners and enter the ring, making sure to hold the ropes open for their companions. As the music fades out, the lid to the casket flies open and everyone jumps back... only for Eli Buchanan to sit up with a giant shit eating grin on his face. Eli Buchanan climbs out to reveal he is dressed as a priest, holding an urn in his arms. He's met with a loud chorus of boos as he high fives each of his Agents and they all share a laugh. After a moment, Eli walks over to a pulpit and sits the urn down in front of him.
ELI BUCHANAN: Ladies and gentlemen, thank you all for joining us tonight as mourn the loss of Leader of Hammerhead Nation, Jacob Angela Seymour Hammerstein.
CHAD GOMEZ: His middle name was Angela?!
ELI BUCHANAN: I would like to personally thank Jacob’s parents for joining us tonight.
Eli points to the clowns, who wave to the crowd.
ELI BUCHANAN: They flew all the way in from Why, Arizona, and boy are their arms tired.
The crowd lets out a collective groan at the terrible joke, but the Agents are cackling madly!
ELI BUCHANAN: Jacob was a good man. Yes, he was dumb as a shit load of brick and twice as ugly. His taste in fashion and women both left a lot to be desired and his singing voice literally made people projectile vomit.
The Agents nod, and pretend to lose their cookies just thinking about it.
ELI BUCHANAN: But he was a good man. He will be missed by his friends and loved ones, both of which are lying in hospital beds at the moment, as well by all the restaurants who he single handedly kept in business.
Eli points at the hotdog vendor, who’s still selling his wares to the crowd.
ELI BUCHANAN: That’s Murray, he followed Jacob everywhere just to sell him hotdogs and Murray has asked me to inform all of you, solely because of Jacob Hammerstein, he will be able to send his children to any college they want.
This is met with a mixed reaction from the crowd but a chant of “Murray” breaks out and the hotdog vendor waves to the crowd.
ELI BUCHANAN: Yes, well done Murray, well done. Now it’s unfortunate for Jacob that he was not as generous and loyal to those close to him, as he was to all his friends down at Pollo Bucket and many of its competitors. If he was, perhaps he would be standing with us today, instead of finding his bodily remains in this.
He holds up the urn and laughs as he’s met with another chorus of boos.
ELI BUCHANAN: Now, my colleges, Agents D and B, were going to say a few words, but they’re too filled with grief...
The two goons pretend to cry and are comforted by their dates.
ELI BUCHANAN: So instead we present to you this lovely video in tribute...
“I Will Remember You” by Sarah McLachlan plays as we see clips of Hammerstein’s matches in Pollomania and Lion’s Road, most of which is him stumbling around in the ring and getting beaten up. As the song ends we see the events that transpired following the match between Team S.H.I.T. and the Agents of Pain, ending with the Agents holding Hammerstein’s arms while Eli throws a fireball in his face. As we come back from the video package the crowd boos, while Eli and the Agents of Pain are laughing in the middle of the ring.
ELI BUCHANAN: Let what happened to poor Jacob Hammerstein be a lesson to you all. If you turn down an offer to join Buck U Productions...
He opens the urn and raises it over his head.
ELI BUCHANAN: You get burnt!
He turns the urn over in his hand, expecting ashes to pour out but nothing comes out. Visibly confused, he looks at the Agents before reaching into the urn, pulls something out and looks at it. His face goes pale and he drops it to the ground.
CHAD GOMEZ: That's...
BASTIAN KRULL: A Tiger Mask.
CHAD GOMEZ: Almost a year ago, Eli Buchanan was wearing that mask when one of his signature fireballs ended up in his face! How did that get in there?!
The crowd is left confused as Eli yells at the Agents, who can only shrug at him, before he hastily exits the ring and rushes off to the back with his men following behind him, half dragging their dates with them. Eli Buchanan stops at the announce desk and demands answers, but Gomez and Krull cannot offer him anything. The mourners begin exiting and Blitz, the Seahawks mascot begins chucking Seahawks merch out into the crowd. Buchanan marches up to him and yells, demanding he stop throwing trash at the fans which earns quite a bit of boos. Buchanan grabs the remaining merch and throws it in the garbage. Blitz hangs his head in shame. The former Tiger Mask Red turns to leave and Blitz takes off his head... Buchanan looks up on the video wall and sees that Blitz is... HAMMERSTEIN?!
CHAD GOMEZ: What!?
Hammer chucks the Blitz head at Buchanan like a dodgeball, knocking him to the ground. The Agents come rushing back out, standing guard over Buchanan as he gets back to his feet. They pull their angry manager away to the back as Hammerstein slides into the ring, a little difficult to do in the mascot costume and begins knocking over his casket and then smashes the picture of himself over the ring post as we go to commercial.
PRIDE CHAMPIONS KENSHIN TAKAMURA & MATT PULVER DEFEND AGAINST ROBB DANIELS AND BEN CHRENSHAW IN OUR MAIN EVENT AFTER THIS QUICK COMMERCIAL BREAK!
We return from break with the main even competitors all standing inside the ring awaiting Jake Aarons official introductions...
JAKE AARONS: Ladies and gentlemen! This is your main event of the evening scheduled for one fall with a thirty minute time limit! Introducing first the challengers! At a combined weight of four hundred and forty seven pounds... the Iron Champion Ben Chrenshaw! And the King of the Lions Champion Robb Daniels! THEY ARE THE ESSENTIAL!
The fans in Mane Event Studios shower the champions with boos.
JAKE AARONS: Their opponents at a combined weight of four hundred and four pounds... they are the current, reigning and defending Pride Champions... Matt Pulver! Kenshin Takamura! THE STREAK!
While the good guys earn a favourable reaction.
JAKE AARONS: Your referee for this contest is Cordell Garner!
Garner finishes checking over all four men as Jake Aarons exits the ring. The Essential's starting man is Robb Daniels up against Matt Pulver of the Streak! The two men engage in a collar and elbow tie-up and despite Pulver's best efforts to plant his feet and prevent it, the King of the Lions Champion backs him into the corner. Garner calls for a clean break, but Daniels waits until four to break and Pulver angrily shoves Daniels back in response to that. Daniels has a good chuckle with Chrenshaw about that before he meets Pulver back in the centre of the ring and locks up again. The result remains the same as Daniels once more muscles Pulver back toward the corner. Matt Wrestling kicks off the turnbuckle and spins them both around, arm dragging Daniels to the mat. Daniels gets up slowly and mockingly applauds Pulver to draw his ire. The youngster doesn't look too impressed by the antics of the World Champion and rushes to lock-up with him. Pulver grabs an arm wringer and twists it tight. Daniels in response reaches around Pulver's face and fishhooks his mouth! He pulls Pulver down into a doubled over position and knees him in the gut before throwing him back. Pulver falls to the mat in a seated position and Daniels dusts his hands off while sharing another laugh with Chrenshaw. Kenshin Takamura can be heard telling Matt Pulver not too lose his cool, but the Swedish Fish gets up and once again, the World Champion and he engage in a collar and elbow tie up. Daniels Irish whips him right out of it! Pulver hits the ropes and ducks Daniels' attempt at a lariat, hitting the opposite side and waylaying the King of the Lions with a single leg dropkick! Daniels goes down and rolls out of the ring drawing Ben Chrenshaw into the match via automatic tag. Chrenshaw tries to get the jump on Pulver, but he's nailed with a leaping enzuigiri! With the Iron Champion down on one knee, Pulver grabs his arm and drags him over to Takamura and the Japanese sensation tags in.
BASTIAN KRULL: The Essential believe that the Streak are a team just waiting to crack. There may be some good insight behind that because they started off as a promising trio and were fractured before they really even got a chance to begin when Jack Rose was attacked and put out of action. Takamura and Pulver managed to march on without their ally and were able to win the Pride titles without him.
CHAD GOMEZ: Yeah, but you know in the back of their minds that the whole Jack Rose situation just irks them. They don't know who did it! They'd love to say the Essential did it, but there's been no proof to support that theory.
Takamura backs Chrenshaw into the ropes and then hip throws him with the O Goshi and follows it up with a cross armbreaker! Chrenshaw scrambles to the ropes and even goes as far to get his body halfway out of the ring, but Takamura drags him back inside and releases the hold before quickly reapplying it as a way to circumvent the rules of the rope break. Daniels tries to jump back in to save his partner, but Pulver rushes into the ring and prevents that from happening. In the commotion, Takamura releases the armbreaker and drags Chrenshaw to his feet. Both he and Pulver back the singles champions into opposite corners and whip them out into each other! Both men roll out of the ring!
BASTIAN KRULL: Both singles champions wise to roll out of the ring after that exchange. They butted heads and fans at home, you'd be surprised how many three count falls I've seen come off of that. It doesn't look like much, but it can knock you out.
Chrenshaw slithers back into the ring and locks up with the Tokyo Tiger. Despite Takamura gaining an arm wringer on him, Chrenshaw kicks him in the knee and drop toe holds him down to the mat. He leaps up into a side headlock position, but Takamura scoots out of it and applies a grounded hammerlock! Chrenshaw reaches out for the ropes, Lauren Parker-Daniels tries to push the rope toward him but gets admonished by Garner for doing so. He threatens to throw her out if he catches her doing anything else, she raises her arms in innocence as Mane Event goes to commercial.
THE PRIDE TITLE MATCH CONTINUES IN A MOMENT!
Chrenshaw backs Takamura into the ropes and knees him in the gut a few times before sending him out. The Iron Champion nails a calf kick on Takamura that knocks him back into the ropes, Chrenshaw gets up and tags Daniels in before drop toe holding Kenshin to the mat. Daniels runs up and knee drops Takamura in the back of the head! He rolls him over!
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KICK OUT!
Daniels grabs Takamura up by the hair and pulls him to his feet. He jaw jacks with the fans for a few moments before hoisting Takamura into the air and snaps him back down to the mat with a suplex! He floats over!
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Takamura gets a shoulder up! Daniels quickly gets up, dragging Takamura with him and tags the Iron Champion back into the match. Chrenshaw barks an order and Daniels nods, the duo whip Takamura off the ropes and Daniels hoists him in the air with a spinebuster... bringing him down across Chrenshaw's knee! Daniels exit as Chrenshaw drops down for a lateral press!
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Pulver breaks up the pin! Referee Cordell Garner gets up and tries to force Pulver back to his corner, but Chrenshaw is milking this situation for all its worth - antagonizing the youngster. Chrenshaw dumps Takamura to the floor and Pulver tries to charge him again, but Garner has to physically restrain him as he didn't see the automatic tag take place. Daniels pulls Takamura up on the floor and shoots him into the guardrail! Daniels rolls him back into the ring. Pulver is finally forced back onto the apron and Chrenshaw grabs Takamura's leg and begins kicking it, he tries to turn Takamura over but the Tokyo Tiger reaches up! Lauren Parker-Daniels leaps onto the apron as Takamura small packages Chrenshaw! Garner misses this as he's busy throwing her out! The fans count for him though!
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3-Daniels breaks up the phantom pin anyway. Security whisks the first lady of Lion's Road away, but the Essential have got away with another one. Chrenshaw pulls Takamura to his feet and tries for a body slam, but Takamura slips out and runs him into the ropes. Daniels blind tags and Takamura gives Chrenshaw an O'Connor Roll! He has him pinned, but Garner says he isn't the legal man! Daniels runs in and nails the unsuspecting Takamura with a swinging neckbreaker! The King of the Lions gets up and points at Pulver, who glares back in response. Daniels pulls Takamura up and whips him into the ropes. Daniels doubles over and eats a face full of boot for that, he blindly staggers over and makes the tag to Chrenshaw while Takamura is down and looking for Pulver!
BASTIAN KRULL: Kenshin Takamura has been in there since the early moments of the match, Matt Pulver should've been the legal man a few minutes earlier but referee Cordell Garner has to see a tag take place - automatic or otherwise - for it to count. So while Takamura was thrown to the floor, the Essential were wise to do what they did and get him back in the ring before Garner could see what they'd done.
Chrenshaw stomps on Takamura's thigh, ordering him to get up and asking if he's had enough. He grabs Takamura's leg and throws it up into the air, driving the knee back down into the mat. Chrenshaw steps on it and then steps over it, putting all his weight down on the leg. Takamura rolls away into a corner but unfortunately for him it's a neutral corner. Chrenshaw runs and drives his knee into Takamura's midsection while in the corner, he repeats this several times before grabbing Takamura's head and trying to plant one there. Takamura blocks it, pushes Chrenshaw back and clocks him with the rolling elbow known as the Tsunami Crash! Chrenshaw spills to the mat and Takamura collapses. He scratches and claws his way to the corner, tagging in Matt Pulver! Pulver hops in, greeting Daniels with a right hand! Chrenshaw somehow staggers to his feet and Pulver snaps off a Northern Lights suplex! Daniels gets back up... DROPKICK! Daniels falls into the corner! Chrenshaw is trying to pull himself up in the corner... Pulver runs up, grabs a waist lock... GERMAN SUPLEX! Daniels charges Pulver, hoisting him up as if to go for an Alabama Slam style spinebuster. Pulver wiggles free, slips down the back... SUNSET FLI--Daniels isn't coming down! Takamura dives into the ring... TSUNAMI CRASH TO THE WORLD CHAMPION! Daniels goes down, Pulver transitions into the Alligator Clutch!
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Pulver leaps into the air in excitement, knowing what he just did. He jumps on Kenshin Takamura, who falls to the mat too exhausted to support his partner's weight! The two exchange a hug on the ground as Pulver rolls out of the ring and leaps onto the guardrail, raising his arms. Suddenly, a fan strikes Pulver!
CHAD GOMEZ: Did a fan just hit him!?
Pulver falls off the guardrail onto the venue's hardwood floor. Alexander Irvine stands up with a smile and slowly climbs over the guardrail. Like a predator, he slowly approaches Pulver who is crawling away and doesn't see the Unnatural stalking behind him. Irvine begins warming up his arm for the Battle Cry.
BASTIAN KRULL: Oh, come on! You're supposed to be a sportsman, Irvine!
The crowd is reaching a fever pitch, but it gets louder as Julian Cutlass sprints down to the ring as he stops in front of his partner. Kenshin Takamura is leaning over the middle rope, exhausted but watching the scene. The Essential have gathered their wits about them, also watching the drama unfold. With Cutlass and Irvine engaged in a standoff, Takamura drops out of the ring and lifts up Pulver. Pulver is surprised to see that it was Irvine who struck him, and becomes incensed. Takamura and referee Cornell Garner restrain him as Alexander Irvine and Julian Cutlass are locked, eye to eye. Becky Chande slowly approaches the two men and sticks a microphone between them.
JULIAN CUTLASS: ...the hell are you doing?
ALEXANDER IRVINE: Oh, you know... just scouting the competition.
JULIAN CUTLASS: Don't patronize me. This is what THEY want, Alex... all the top brass, the fat chicken in their cushioned chairs. This isn't wrestling! They're trying to suck you into their world, but this isn't how we settle things.
ALEXANDER IRVINE: How do we settle things, Jule?
The crowd roars with an immense pop and even the Streak and the Essentials, having put their match behind them, exchange glances among one another as Julian Cutlass and Alexander Irvine stand silently before one another, sizing one another up. A Cold War with two great superpowers and the rest of the world watching, waiting for one of them to flinch.
JULIAN CUTLASS: You want to do it this way?
ALEXANDER IRVINE: You tell me.
Irvine wears a smirk on his face. The crowd is having a fit and anyone paying attention can see that he is thriving off of their energy. Cutlass is angry, almost solemn, that they’re on the verge of a showdown. Seemingly every member of the front row has their head in their hands and their mouth agape. Children wearing Black Lion’s Road gear can be seen mouthing “oh my God, oh my God, oh my God…” Chrenshaw and Daniels both seem slightly amused while Takamura is trying to settle Pulver down again. The entire arena is waiting for the ring to go nuclear. Cutlass turns his head to the side. For a moment he closes his eyes in thought and then trains his gaze back on Irvine.
JULIAN CUTLASS: So be it.
The crowd hoops and holler as the fans begin stomping on their seats, sending a metallic shudder throughout the venue.
JULIAN CUTLASS: But it's going down in there.
Cutlass points to the ring.
JULIAN CUTLASS: Next week!
The fans pop huge as Cutlass brushes past Chande and walks to the back. Irvine stands triumphantly, smirking and winks at Pulver before making his own exit.
BASTIAN KRULL: Cutlass vs. Irvine next week! The Black Lion's Road explodes!
Pulver grabs his belt and rushes to the back. Chrenshaw and Daniels pass Takamura in the aisle, each man on either side of him. Takamura eyes both men, not sure what to make of this... but they both nod and laugh and walk by. Kenshin Takamura doesn't look too impressed by it.
BASTIAN KRULL: Fans, we are out of time here on Mane Event! Big things happening in our final moments! The Streak retain their titles, Matt Pulver pins Robb Daniels which in past situations has led to a title shot. Alexander Irvine struck Matt Pulver once again, bringing out Julian Cutlass and both member's of Black Lion's Road have agreed to face off in singles competition right here next week in Vancouver - Cutlass' new place of residence. It's going to be big! Don't miss it!
FIN